The Cheapest Person I Know -- 8th Edition

Saving Watch Battery Life

AOL User Coloradomike26 Says:
"My uncle was so cheap [that] before [he went] to bed he removed the battery of his watch and put it back in the morning to save the life of the battery."
Next: Borrowed Gifts

Borrowed Gifts

AOL User SR550 Says:
"My friend brings library books and CDs, tapes and movies to parties as gifts. Then he expects the recipient to return them to his town library by the date due. He lives far away and the recipient has to mail the items back to his local library on time, or he expects them to pay the late fees."
Next: Buy One, Get One Free

Buy One, Get One Free

AOL User DICKBAMBAM Says:
"One day, three of us at work went to lunch at a pizza joint. We were in line ordering. The first co-worker in line ordered, paid and went to sit down. Next was my cheap friend. He presented a buy-one-get-one-free coupon. He said, 'My friend that just ordered is with me, so I guess I'm the free one.' He never offered to go half with the other co-worker."
Next: Bring Your Own Burger

Bring Your Own Burger

AOL User Tgun6542 Says:
"I've got a brother-in-law who will call you to come grill burgers. On the way over there, he will call you to pick up the meat, buns, and other fixings. When you get there he always has a 'project' that involves heavy labor for you to 'help' him with, and you have to grill your own burgers. I worked for a lumber mill and could get lumber really cheap. I got him the lumber to build a big shop, saving him about $4,000. Used up my day off and my gas. He gave me $3 for gas."
Next: Texting Tightwad

Texting Tightwad

AOL User Heiress4Life57 Says:

"Someone I know actually charged me for text messaging him, believe it or not."

Next: Time for a New Boyfriend

Time for a New Boyfriend

AOL User DORFMONT Says:
"My gentleman friend is so cheap the only time he calls me is from someone else's phone. He demands that I call him at certain times of the night, usually when I'm working with a client. He invites me to go somewhere, expects me to drive us there, then changes his mind and wants to stay home. Bummer."
Next: Surgeon on a Budget

Surgeon on a Budget

AOL User KPressler3365 Says:
"My ex-husband John, who made more than enough money to do anything he wanted, because he is a general surgeon and does urgent care, would reuse paper towels at least ten times. He had underwear from the 1980's. He would get out needle and thread and sew up large holes in very old undies and socks. His 1970's pants were so thin that I could see if he had a design on his boxers. We [finally] bought a new dining room table and china hutch after many years of an empty dining room. Pretty embarrassing being the wife of a general surgeon."
Next: Flowers From the Grave

Flowers From the Grave

AOL User Navajo504 Says:
"I know someone who would go to the cemetery, get the flowers off the graves and make a bouquet of flowers for his wife at different occasions. This went on for a couple of years until she found out."
Next: Stealing Hospital Coffee

Stealing Hospital Coffee

AOL User BESTBUNNY10 Says:
"My Mom came over from Europe to stay with life-long friends in California. Her friend took her out for the day for shopping and sightseeing and asked my Mom if she would like to go somewhere for coffee. My Mom said yes. When she saw her friend turning into a hospital parking lot, she asked her friend why they were at the hospital. Her friend said that they were going there for coffee because it was free. What, no Starbucks?"
Next: Gas Hog

Gas Hog

AOL User Baby7219 Says:
"If we go to the gas station, my husband will pick up the hose after he has pumped all that he needs or has paid for, since most are pre-pay now, and say there's about 20-30 cents more that he paid for that he isn't getting by letting it go."
Next: Bathing for the Holidays

Bathing for the Holidays

AOL User Manntwacked Says:
"My grandma was so cheap that she would only bathe on holidays to save on soap and water. Boy, did my grandpa love Christmas and New Year's, because her baths were a week apart."
Next: Loving the Lost and Found

Loving the Lost and Found

AOL User Bustuc58 Says:

"For the four years he worked at a national park, my stepson dressed from the park's lost and found pile."

Next: Lying for Free Food

Lying for Free Food

AOL User DrFoxTon69 Says:
"While I was at a Chinese restaurant enjoying my dinner, some teenage kid stands up when the bill comes and says he refuses to pay because there was a cat paw in his food! Of course this startled everyone, and we're all checking our sesame chicken, but they funny part was if there was a cat paw in his food, wouldn't he show it to everyone. He had an empty plate on his table, and there was no sign of a cat paw -- only some kid who was too cheap to pay the bill when it came."
Next: Don't Do Business With Family

Don't Do Business With Family

AOL User Roundeis Says:
"When we bought our house, the person handling the sale for relatives was so cheap that when he didn't show up for the appraisal and the appraiser gave us a number that was lower than he thought he could get for the house, he actually asked us to pay $500 for a second appraisal so that we could buy the house for a higher price! The funniest part of all this was that he asked with a straight face and actually seemed surprised when we said no. And this person was family!"
Next: Never Pays for Anything

Never Pays for Anything

AOL User Fyreflypj Says:
"I have a single friend who eats at all the happy hour places she can find for free and just orders water with a lemon slice. She gets the iced tea 50 cent refill at Starbucks until the plastic cup falls apart, takes her own food into the movie theater, and insists on splitting a meal every time we go out. For presents she either buys them at the Dollar Tree or takes the kiddie menus and crayons at restaurants, soaps and shampoos at hotels, free goodies at the banks in her town and gives them as gifts. She thinks nothing of giving you a gently used item as a gift."
Next: No Garbage Service

No Garbage Service

AOL User LarryH49 Says:
"Whenever I picked up my friend at his house he always had two or three small plastic grocery bags with him. As we would drive by a shopping center he would ask to stop, and he would drop one in the trash can in front of the store. Then we would stop somewhere else and he would dispose of the other bag. I found out he did not have garbage service and would dispose of the garbage free whenever he went out."
Next: Guest Chairs? Overrated.

Guest Chairs? Overrated.

AOL User PirateCarrotJoe Says:
"My cousin only has two chairs in his house -- one for his wife and one for him. There are no chairs outside for anyone to sit. The reasons for this are: he doesn't want anyone to come visit and he is cheap (even though he can afford chairs). He is cheap with a lot of things but this is the strangest thing he does."
Next: Learn to Share

Learn to Share

AOL User Compusa7457 Says:
"My male relative is so cheap that while visiting relatives he asked for coffee. The host family had no coffee in the house, thus Mr. Cheap went out to the trunk of his car, took out his jar of instant coffee and proceeded back into the house. He made one cup of coffee for himself, took his jar of coffee back out to his trunk and offered neither of his hosts a drop. After Mr. Cheapo concluded his visit, the host noticed that the bath towel set in the Cheap's guest bath had left with him. This is also a guy who melts soap slivers and reshapes them into recycled bars of soap."
Next: Laundry Saver

Laundry Saver

AOL User Deedy815 Says:
"My father-in-law recently came to live with us. He will squeeze two dimes together to get a quarter, but this was a bit too much. When he moved in he told us that he sleeps on one side of the bed one week and the other side of the bed the next week just so he is not washing a clean side of the sheets and wasting money."
Next: Old Tortilla Chips

Old Tortilla Chips

Old Tortilla Chips
AOL User OhGaWsH2012 Says:
"My mother is currently standing in her kitchen cutting up and frying old flour tortilla shells to make tortilla chips in oil that has been reused quite a few times. She expects these to be eaten by my family."
Next: Selling Unused Parking Meter Time

Selling Unused Parking Meter Time

AOL User Sedunning Says:
"My friend went shopping with her mother-in-law who is well-off enough to live in a huge house in a gated community. They found a good parking place downtown and put in enough coins for 2 hours. They finished the errands sooner than expected, and the mother-in-law stood by the car trying to 'sell' the unused time on the meter to other drivers who were pulling up."
Next: Washing in the Rain

Washing in the Rain

AOL User Twokahn1 Says:
"I caught my boss running out into the rain to wipe down his Audi in the rain. He admitted he was doing it to save the price of a car wash."

Next: Reused Salad Dressing

Reused Salad Dressing

Reused Salad Dressing
AOL User Maureen1016 Says:
"I used to have friends who were so cheap that after you finished having salad at their house, they would funnel the leftover salad dressing in the bottom of everyone's salad bowl back into the bottle to be used again. Gross, needless to say. I brought my own salad dressing after that and just told them I like mine better."
Next: Using Teabags Twice

Using Teabags Twice

AOL User GREWAL58 Says:
"My dad's uncle is so cheap, he uses a teabag and then dries it and uses it again."
Next: Lunch From Samples

Lunch From Samples

Lunch From Samples
AOL User PMancin534 Says:
"[My friend] lunches on samples at food stores and just drinks water."
Next: Hand-Me-Down Shoes

Hand-Me-Down Shoes

AOL User TrishaKorzelius Says:
"Every time my two teenage sons needed new shoes or sneakers, their father would buy himself a new pair and give the boys his old ones. For my daughter's 15th birthday he gave her a digital camera. As she opened it, she remarked that it was exactly like his. She realized what he had done, and when she went to use it, it didn't work anyway. This same man collected $10 a week from his children the years they were 8, 10, 11 and 13 years old so he could take them on a vacation those years. He is a lawyer. They laugh it off now and love him anyway."
Next: Too Cheap For a Bed

Too Cheap For a Bed

AOL User Vickie1112 Says:
"I have a sister-in-law who agreed to go in on rent with her friends for a ski lodge, and she insisted upon sleeping on the floor. When it came time to pay her share of the rent she refused to pay because she said that she didn't occupy a room, she only slept on the floor. She also had a habit of forgetting her purse when she went out to eat dinner with us, and she would order one of the most expensive entrees on the menu and then let us pay."
Next: They're on to You!

They're on to You!

AOL User CDavis2 Says:
"One of our neighbors and his wife routinely go to restaurants, eat 3/4 of their meal and then complain loudly to the manager that something is wrong and refuse to pay. They've done this so many times all of the restaurants in the area have their names and refuse to seat them. They keep trying new places."
Next: Gas Stealer

Gas Stealer

AOL User Raybenconst Says:
"My brother-in-law borrowed my truck to pick up a treadmill at Sears. It should have consumed about five dollars in gas. My truck has dual tanks. He supposedly consumed $125 in gas. Who knows what happened to my gas? He probably siphoned it. There's a lesson to be learned here -- it doesn't pay to be a nice guy!"
Next: Stocking Up on Cream and Sugar

Stocking Up on Cream and Sugar

AOL User Airboss280 Says:
"I have a friend who goes to McDonald's and orders a senior coffee to go. He then fills the bag with creamers, sugar and napkins to last a month. All for just 49 cents. What a cheapo."
Next: Body Clock Training

Body Clock Training

AOL User KenerBener Says:
"I knew someone who was so cheap that they trained their body clock to poop at work, so they didn't have to use their own toilet paper at home to wipe. So every day around 10 am they asked to be released from their phone position and went in to unload their digested food from the day before and wipe away. I guess that was better than stealing the paper to bring home."
Next: Converting Two-Ply to One

Converting Two-Ply to One

AOL User JohnnyA420 Says:
"My mom would buy two-ply toilet paper and split it in half to make one-ply paper."
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