WalletPop

Moneycentric gardening

Tom Barlow — 2008-05-15T11:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Food

I grew up working (grudgingly) in my parent's garden. Every year, as I hilled potatoes, I wondered why we grew the same vegetables that were on sale dirt cheap in the grocery store. I still wonder that as I see people plant zucchini, tomatoes and green beans, veggies that are practically given away during the height of the season.

Instead, perhaps gardeners should concentrate on those items that they pay a hefty price for. If I were planning a garden strictly on saving the most money, I'd include--

Yellow and red peppers: no harder to grow than green ones, and sliced and bagged, they freeze well.
Basil, cilantro, and parsley: A friend makes his pesto in huge batches and freezes it in ice cube trays, a perfect one-meal size. The cost of buying fresh herbs is many times its cost to grow.
Brussels Sprouts: An easy crop to grow and infinitely better fresh than frozen, the price never seems reasonable at the grocery store.
Jalapeno and serrano peppers: Also sold at a premium, these will last a long time in the crisper, especially if stored in bags specially made to prolong the life of greenstuff. Note: keep them well away from your other peppers, so they don't cross-pollinate and provide a hot surprise.
Sugar snap peas: another vegetable easy to grow but expensive to buy, it is delicious raw or cooked.

What veggies could you save the most money on by growing yourself?

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Sneaky restaurant tricks: Ten to watch out for

Carol Vinzant — 2008-05-15T08:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Budgets, Entrepreneurship, Food

Restaurants are feeling the pinch in two directions. With money tight, consumers are cutting back on how often they dine out. Meantime, food costs more. Way more.

Egg prices have doubled in the last six months. Dairy, chicken, beer and bread crumb prices are all climbing higher. Even when the core commodity escapes the trend, packaged ingredients and other restaurant supplies are more expensive as the costs of transportation climb due to higher fuel prices.

When people do go out, they are ordering less. "Appetizer sales are down. Dessert sales can almost disappear," says Dan Simons, principal at Vucurevich Simons Advisory Group, a restaurant consulting firm. "And the most expensive items on the menu aren't sold as much."

Restaurants know there's a limit to how much they can raise prices without driving off already broke customers. So for now, many are looking for ways to raise prices and cut costs that won't be too obvious.

The next time you go out -- if you can afford to go out at all -- see if you can find your favorite restaurant working any of these old gimmicks. Read on and you may even learn some tricks you can use to stretch a buck in your kitchen at home:

Cut back on portions:

Restaurants normally spend between 25% and 40% of their budgets on food, according to Barry Brown, president of Profit Strategies Solutions, which sells software for restaurants to manage inventory and profitability.

So if they can make a smaller hamburger and still sell it for the same price, their profits go up. Milk shakes at family diners that could once be split three-ways may now truly be single serve. There are reports of some restaurants buying smaller plates so customers won't notice they have reduced portions and chefs won't be tempted to heap on food to make dishes look appealing.

Eric Arthur, president of Marketplace Management Group, a restaurant procurement company in Collierville, Tenn., expects to see more junior-sized portions offered on menus. "You might have a shot-glass-sized dessert. It gives the customer the opportunity to say 'I can still have some dessert' and it gives the owner the opportunity to still add a dollar to the bill," says Arthur.

"Americans have been kind of spoiled. We have supersized everything," Arthur says. "That's not necessarily the way it is in the rest of the world."

Cut back on the most expensive ingredients:

Maybe the recipe calls for five sticks of butter. In good times, the baker adds six because she thinks it tastes better. But in tough times, she'll stick to five (or worse, substitute a stick or two of margarine in the recipe). The chef may prefer to load up on shrimp when preparing his signature gumbo, but he knows his job depends on restricting the number to four or five per serving.

Brown recommends restaurateurs get very strict about standardizing portions at times like these. They might tell their cooks, for example, to use 10% less chicken in entrées or chop off less of the strawberry when they make shortcake. "Usually, either they switch to a scale or offer additional training," says Brown.

Managers may shift to dishes that call for less expensive ingredients -- for example, from beef to chicken or from chicken to pasta. Consumers may want these lower priced alternatives, and restaurants like them because they can often make a higher profit margin on them.

"If you see a resurgence of liver and onions, don't be surprised," says Simons. "It's an old school comfort dish for a lot of people and the cost is low."

Maybe the chef used to get the highest quality beef available. Those generous days may be coming to a close. If you see a menu item for some kind of marinated steak, it may be a flank steak, a cheap, tough cut that has been marinated and pounded to submission, said one chef at a private club who asked not to be identified. You may see more items with ground chuck, otherwise known as hamburger.

One chef who works with VSAG says that he makes up for the everyday image of hamburger meat by insisting on only the freshest beef from his vendors. "I know it's not super fancy, but if prepared well it is heavenly," says the chef. "It is all about the age of the chuck: the fresher the better! 'No age please,' that is what I insist to my vendors when ordering chuck."

Cut back on freshness:

Food distributors are charging restaurants fuel surcharges these days because of high gas prices. So, restaurants are trying to cut back on the number of deliveries they get. Instead of getting fresh produce every day, they get bigger quantities less frequently.

Other kitchens may switch to frozen for items that they rarely use but want to keep on hand, such as avocados.

Use everything (even if that means recycling items):

Here's a simple example: The chef may prefer to discard tomatoes that aren't the ripest red. But, these days, to make use of every last tomato ordered, you might see a few green slices make their way onto your hamburger.

Restaurants also need to be extra-efficient about using everything they buy. In order to be prepared for a dinner rush, they need to have lots of extras on hand -- rolls, desserts, side dishes, cuts of meat for entrées. But if they have a slow night, they don't just throw the extras out.

An efficient manager knows how to use every last piece of food. That new special soup? Could be just an excuse to use some meat and vegetables they got for another dish but didn't sell. A salad bar can be the serving site of last resort for cheese or vegetables that are about to turn. See lots of chili? It may be a disguise for leftover hamburger. Bread pudding? That's yesterday's Danish. Homemade croutons? A great use of stale bread. Potato skins? A terrific way to use the leftover baked potatoes (which have to be baked in advance because they take so long.) Potato soup? More rerun potatoes.

You get the message.

Pour weaker drinks:

Your favorite bartender is probably not stingy with portions. Bartenders have a way of pouring generous drinks and maybe even offering one on the house. But now his boss may be breathing down his neck to ensure he is not so glad-handed.

The biggest wasted item at restaurants that Brown sees is liquor. "It isn't necessarily theft, just over-usage of the item," Brown says. "It's not even that they're sloppy or generous. It's just not being a machine." Now the price of beer is rising, putting owners on high alert.

Bartenders can easily over-pour a drink without even trying (of course, the potential for a good tip doesn't exactly disincentivize them). In the United Kingdom pubs must sell liquor in 25 ml or 35 ml servings and have bar gadgets that pour exactly that amount. Maybe they'll start becoming a common sight in the U.S., too.

Switch to a cheaper brand of certain ingredients:

Restaurant owners have become compulsive shoppers. That's quite a change. Eric Arthur says restaurant owners normally stick with the same supplier year after year, almost like baseball players stick with lucky socks. Now they're trying many suppliers and many brands.

For restaurant owners who are less fastidious on quality, a switch to a cheaper supplier can mean lower quality. If your favorite grilled cheese doesn't taste quite as good as it used to, a change in supplier could well be the reason.

Don's Dock in Des Plaines, Ill., is one of the most popular seafood restaurants in the Chicago suburbs. Owner Andrew Johnson, whose family has been in seafood for 70 years, is determined not to skimp on the fish and shrimp. "With our seafood, we're not going to sacrifice the quality," Johnson says. "We just shop around more."

The huge hike in grain prices means that a bag of breadcrumbs went from $19 a bag to $37 over the last year. Instead of shifting to a lower quality, Johnson spends more time comparing prices. "For breadcrumbs there used to be one or two suppliers. Now we have six or eight purveyors," Johnson says.

Switch to cheaper toilet paper, take-out containers and bags:

"Paper and disposables, oh my gracious, that's the very first place I start," says Arthur. "There are big bucks, I mean, big, big bucks in that." Sometimes owners can get the same items for less if they just spend more time shopping. Or, they may decide that food quality is sacrosanct but napkin quality is not.

Arthur asks restaurant owners what they pay for cups and trash bags and is often surprised by the answer. "Someone may be paying $80 a case for trash bags that they could be buying for $20," he says. "Do you know how many extra sandwiches they'd have to sell to make up that $60?"

Push the highest profit margin items, not the best-tasting ones:

"Most restaurants want to sell the best thing on the menu," says Arthur. "They're not thinking, 'What's the thing I'm going to make the most money on?'" That changes once they figure out their food costs.

Often the signature dish may not be all that profitable. But a pasta dish can offer a low cost for the eater and a drastically lower food cost for the restaurant. Arthur recommends restaurants look to add low cost, high margin dishes. In other words, it's better for them to make $2 off a $12 entrée than to make $2 off a $25 dish -- even though making the $25 dish may be more fun.

Another technique: A restaurant that uses a professional menu designer will steer eaters to the high margin items. Big chains are already well-practiced in this mystical art; now smaller restaurants are seeing what a boost it can give their bottom line, says Michael Kristoff, president and creative director of Kristoff Creative, a Nashville, Tenn., design firm.

"There's a psychology to it, an engineering the placement of things," says Kristoff. "The third item in a list is generally the most selected item. So that's where you would put your highest margin item." Profitable items may also get stars or boxes around them. You may see prices de-emphasized. Kristoff steers restaurants away from the typical diner menu where all the prices line up in a column.

"That's the last thing you ever want to do -- the number one biggest mistake," Kristoff says. "People easily see the prices and start shopping by price. Price should be the last consideration. People on budget are going to do that anyway but you don't want to force it on them."

Slowly raise prices so it's not as noticeable:

Restaurants normally raise price only once or twice a year. Now you'll see many more increases along the way. That's because prices are moving as much in a month as they used to in a year.

Andrew Johnson has had to raise prices four times in the last two months at his seafood restaurant. He now prints only 500 menus at a time instead of 5,000. He used to check his ingredient prices every couple months; now he makes sure to look every week.

Eric Arthur says restaurant owners are always reluctant to raise prices, fearing they'll drive off customers. But he's worked to convince his restaurant clients that in this downturn, the only restaurants that survive will be the ones that raise their prices regularly to keep up with costs.

Beg for sympathy from your customers:

You may start seeing signs about higher commodity prices. Or news articles pinned to the window. Or hear desperate justification of the higher prices in a conversation with the owner. They want to make sure you know they're not just being greedy.

Most restaurateurs are passionate about keeping their food quality up and won't compromise on their signature dishes. But with customers cutting back on dining out and food prices soaring, they have little choice but to find creative new ways to trim costs.

Carol Vinzant is a freelance writer in New York.

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Fantastic Freebies! Dunkin' Donuts Coffee + more coffee samples!

Zac Bissonnette — 2008-05-15T00:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Food, Fantastic Freebies

Every day, WalletPop will be bringing you information about a fantastic freebie. Like what you see? Check back tomorrow for more!

Dunkin' Donuts is making a big push to capture a bigger share of the grocery store coffee market, and they're giving away coffee to make it happen!

Just fill out this quick form and they'll mail you a 1.1 ounce Original Blend sample pouch.

Want more free coffee? Seattle's Best Coffee is also offering free samples.

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International foods that will make you laugh yourself silly

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-14T17:15:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food

When it comes to humor, I have to admit that I'm not proud. While I love to spend hours setting up elaborate practical jokes, and will often compose brilliant double, triple, or even quadruple-entendres, I'm not above going for the low-hanging fruit. I will, if the opportunity arises, resort to fart jokes, idiotic puns, and even slapstick. Anything to get a laugh.

With that in mind, it's hardly surprising that I sometimes descend to the lowest of the low: cheap translation humor. For example, I have a Scottish cookbook, passed on to me by my mother, that has a recipe for "Roastit Bubblyjock wi' Cheston Crappin." While there's nothing funny about roasted turkey with chestnut stuffing, roastit bubblyjock had me laughing for months. Frankly, it still brings a smile to my face. The same goes for "Spotted Dick with Custard," which was a standard dessert at my office canteen when I worked in the UK. Am I immature for giggling like a schoolgirl whenever it was on the menu? Yes, I am. Did that stop me from offering to let co-workers take a bite of my spotted dick? No, it didn't.

Recently, one of my Walletpop colleagues gave me a link to a site that carried a list of foods with funny names. The really funny thing was that I had tried many of the products that I saw featured there. Mental mints? Check. Jamaican Cock soup? Been there, done that. "Smack My Ass" hot sauce? It's on my shelf.

What's even worse is that I've gotten so used to some of these foods that I don't see the humor anymore. Whenever somebody giggles about Jerk Chicken or Sok Banan, it takes me a moment to realize that they're not familiar with Jamaican cuisine or the Polish name for "banana juice." Still, as long as I can laugh at "Dry Sack on the rocks" or Cockburn's Ruby Red Port, I guess I'll be okay.

Without any further ado, I'm going to pass on a recipe for jerk chicken. While there are many ways to jerk a chicken, this recipe is definitely adapted for more mainstream American tastes. First off, although it's a really hot dish, it's a lot milder than traditional Jamaican jerk chicken, which is almost inedible. Second, I use skinless, boneless chicken, while traditional Jamaican cooks use whole breasts. They then chop them up, leaving the bones in little, splintered chunks that are an invitation to choking.

Enjoy!

Jamaican Jerk Chicken
1/2 cup white vinegar
1/2 cup orange juice
Juice of one lime
2 tablespoons light olive oil
2 tablespoons dark rum
1 tablespoon brown sugar
4 scallions, coarsely chopped
1-2 habañero peppers, de-seeded
2 teaspoons salt
2 teaspoons black pepper
1 tablespoon allspice, ground
1 tablespoon cinnamon, ground
1 tablespoon nutmeg, ground
1 tablespoon ginger, ground
6 boneless, skinless chicken breasts

Combine all ingredients except chicken breasts in a blender or food processor and blend until almost smooth. Combine paste with breasts in a large ziplock bag or casserole dish, making sure that the chicken breasts are well-coated. Let marinate for a few hours or overnight.

To cook: Jerk chicken is, traditionally, cooked on a grill, but you can also broil it in an oven or (my preferred method) saute/steam it over medium heat in a non-stick pan. For the stove-top method, heat two teaspoons of light olive oil in a non-stick pan until the oil makes a crackling sound when you put food in it. Lightly sear the breasts until they are browned on both sides, then add about a quarter cup of water to the pan. Put a top over the chicken and check it every few minutes to make sure that it isn't burning or cooking dry; add water as needed. The breasts are done when you can pierce them with a fork and the juices run clear.

One big warning: habañeros are serious, serious peppers. If your tastes tend toward milder flavors, you might try switching them out for jalapeño or even poblano peppers. Also, from sad experience, I can tell you that touching them with unprotected hands is a recipe for disaster, especially if you wear contact lenses. Please, I beg you, wear gloves when handling them!

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. Sadly, he makes Beavis and Butthead look mature.

Taco Bell: Recession cuisine?

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-14T15:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Budgets, Food, Saving

Things have been tough for Taco Bell lately. First there was the whole E. coli scare in 2006, which people are still talking about. Then there was the chain's new grills, which it claimed were "green" because they used less water and electricity than traditional steam tables. One of Taco Bell's execs even went so far as to state that "Whether you take shorter showers, turn off the water while brushing your teeth or purchase a Grill-to-Order menu item at Taco Bell, you can save water and impact the environment without even thinking about it." In point of fact, as CNN pointed out, Taco Bell's heavy reliance on beef makes it far from green. Finally, who can forget about Taco Bell's famous rat infestation video, which featured dozens of the furry little critters taking over a New York restaurant.

Still, even with its bacteriological and environmental shortcomings, Taco Bell is my go-to restaurant when it comes to fast food, for the simple reason that it consistently offers relatively healthy (compared to a Big Mac), surprisingly flavorful food for a very low price. My loyalty to the place dates back to when I was a poor starving college student. There was one semester in which I was particularly broke and could only spend about $50 on food. Throwing variety to the wind, I subsisted on plate after plate of hummus, lentils, tuna macaroni salad, and ramen. Whenever I could, I'd find some change in my couch and wander off to Taco Bell, where I could get a burrito for 59¢. It became a lifesaver. Many were the nights when I'd grab a table, pick up a burrito, load it with hot sauce, and savor the joy of something other than my regular fare. When I had an extra couple of cents to splurge, I'd pick up a bottomless cup of soda and revel in my wealth.

Over time, of course, Taco Bell phased out the super value menu. By that point, I had a little more money, so it didn't hit me too hard, although I remember feeling a pang when I discovered that my favorites were now a little more expensive. However, in addition to its push for green cred, Taco Bell seems to be returning to its roots. On May 15, it is rolling out its new "Why Pay More" menu, featuring items that cost 79¢, 89¢, and 99¢. Given that many customers are currently concerned about their ability to pay for gas, the super-cheap menu is coming out at the perfect time. And, to be honest, I will probably be taking advantage of the new offerings.

And I'll remain a Taco Bell regular as long as the rats remain among the patrons, not the ingredients!

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. A recovering fast food junkie, he still dreams about Wendy's "Big Dave's Deluxe" burger.

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Preposterous Products: the talking vodka bottle

Geoff Williams — 2008-05-14T13:15:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food, Home

Life used to be so simple. If you drank a lot and found the bottle talking back to you, you know you've had enough, and that it's time to stop. Conversely, if you were a bartender, and you saw one of your patrons having a conversation with the bottle, you knew it was time to call a cab and send the lush home.

That may change. Or at least in Russia, bickering with one's bottle of booze will no longer be considered odd.

As BBC News recently reported, in Russia, where drinking vodka is a national pastime, they've come up with the world's first ever talking vodka bottle top.

Every time you remove the cap off the bottle, which BBC News refers to as a vodka genie bottle top, a voice starts talking, offering a series of popular Russian toasts. The voice also encourages people to drink up.

And then proving that Russian scientists and vodka marketers have a sense of humor, every time you remove the top from the bottle, the vodka genie's speech becomes more and more slurred.

And I used to think the Hallmark talking cards were clever.

Geoff Williams is a business journalist and the author of C.C. Pyle's Amazing Foot Race: The True Story of the 1928 Coast-to-Coast Run Across America (Rodale).

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India to US: stop blaming us for your rising food costs!

Zac Bissonnette — 2008-05-14T10:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Food

Americans -- the majority of whom are overweight -- are crying their 42-inch waists off over the soaring price of food. Some U.S. officials have suggested that India's rising prosperity and the resulting increase in demand for food are to blame.

India's response? The New York Times has all the details but if you're in a rush, I'll summarize it for you: Sit on it.

Pradeep S. Mehta, secretary general of the center for international trade, economics and the environment of CUTS International said that if Americans ate less, "many hungry people in sub-Saharan Africa would find food on their plates." He also added that the savings resulting from a decreased need for liposuction could be used to feed famine victims.

Burn sauce! Apparently this whole mess started when our commander in chief opined that "When you start getting wealth, you start demanding better nutrition and better food, and so demand is high, and that causes the price to go up."

Indian commerce ministry Jairam Ramesh's rebuttal? "George Bush has never been known for his knowledge of economics." More burn sauce!

I'm inclined to agree with the commentators critical of Bush on this one. The idea of America's president blaming increased consumption in India for rising food prices is laughable. It's like Ralphie May telling Amy Winehouse to get off the couch because she's taking up too much room.

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Pabst casket? A blue-ribbon idea!

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-13T14:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food

Here's a way to have your casket and drink it too...

Aaah, PBR! Let Budweiser claim to be the king of beers; Pabst Blue Ribbon doesn't aspire to such lofty heights. Pabst is the beer of the working man, the hard-core drinker, the one that I'd pick up at the bar when I'd already gotten drunk and couldn't feel my nose. Pabst doesn't waste time on things like flavor or bouquet. No, it's a no-nonsense, get-you-drunk-and-happy beer.

In spite of its shortcomings, PBR has a surprisingly loyal fan base, including my grandfather, my friend John, and Bill Bramanti, a 67-year old Chicago Heights man who recently decided that he wanted his burial to have a little pomp and circumstance. While the Vikings went to Valhalla on flaming ships and the Pharaohs entered the afterlife surrounded by retainers, Bramanti wanted his death to say something about his life. With that in mind, he bought a casket from the Panozzo Brothers funeral home of Chicago Heights and had it customized by the Scott Sign Company, of the same city. Now, when it's Bill's time to enter the great big dive bar in the sky, he's going to do it in style, wrapped in a great big can of Pabst.

In the meantime, neither Bill nor his final vessel are wasting time. Rather than let his custom casket gather dust in the back room of some funeral home, Bramanti is using it. Shortly after getting it home, he filled it with ice and his favorite brew and threw a big party for his friends. As his daughter put it, "Why put such a great novelty piece up on a shelf in storage when you could use it only the way Bill Bramanti would use it?"

Maybe Bramanti is onto something. After all, there's a lot to be said for a casket that lets you live your life the way you want to. For a few thousand dollars, he's gotten a great casket, an awesome conversation piece, and the ultimate beer chest. I wonder if I can get one done up like a bottle of absinthe. For cremation, of course...

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He's wondering if funeral homes will give discounts on Mickey's Wide mouth caskets.

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Smaller portions keep menu prices down -- but people order more!

Zac Bissonnette — 2008-05-13T12:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Food

With food costs rising at a furious pace, restaurants are looking to avoid increasing their menu prices: by serving smaller portions. In addition, many chains are offering really small servings in an effort to lure in health- and budget-conscious consumers.

It's working to the extent that the small servings have quickly become big sellers, but it isn't making people any thinner. According to the USA Today, "Instead, people are using smaller dishes as an excuse to add to their orders, spending - and probably eating - just as much as before."

That's right! No pesky fun-sized dishes are going to interfere with our pursuit of the American Dream: the 42-inch waistline. But at least ordering smaller portions makes people feel healthier -- even if they order 7 of them.

I bet those are the same people who order 2,900-calorie cheese fries, and then wash them down with a Diet Coke.

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Don't bogart the skull, dude!

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-12T18:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food, Health

The idea of using old skulls for the consumption of intoxicants is fairly common. In fact, it's become the basis of more than a few legends. One of my favorites involves Nostradamus, who supposedly predicted that anyone who drank wine from his skull would gain his powers of prediction, but would die soon after. As the tale goes, three French soldiers decided to test this legend in 1791, but the one who drank was shot almost immediately. History doesn't record whether or not he offered any predictions before giving up the ghost.

Another great story involves the head of Edward Teach, the famed "Blackbeard." After years of ruling the seas off the East Coast of North America, he was finally killed in 1718. Rather than bring Teach's corpse back to port, his killers cut off his head and threw his body overboard. After Robert Maynard, the commander of the force that killed Blackbeard, turned in his head for a reward, Governor Spottswood of Virginia hung the trophy from a pike in Bath, Virginia. There are conflicting stories about what happened to the skull; my favorite is that it was gilded with silver and turned into a drinking vessel.

It's not too hard to see why people would contemplate using a skull as a beer mug. Apart from the grisly coolness of the finished product, it's not all that hard to do. Basically, it only requires removing the top of the head, blocking a couple of holes, slapping on a handle, and developing a strong stomach.
On the other hand, constructing a bong from a skull is a pretty difficult undertaking, involving the aforementioned blocking as well as the introduction of various other difficult elements, including hole drilling, carburetor inserting, and so forth. Given a choice, I'd probably go with the femur as a more likely bong candidate, although the humerus would do in a pinch. Still, I guess the thighbone and the arm bone don't quite have the romance of the head bone.

Recently, three Houston teenagers decided to test the potential of bone-based bongs. Apparently, the boys found a disused graveyard, where they proceeded to disinter the body of an 11-year-old boy who died in 1921, remove his skull, and use it to fashion a water pipe. They weren't caught in the act, nor was the scene of the crime discovered. Rather, one of them, Kevin Wade Jones, told the police about his arts and craft project while he was being questioned in connection with a completely unrelated crime. When he was asked why Jones would incriminate himself in this way, a Houston police officer stated that "We can only speculate and guess to what goes on in the criminal mind."

I'm sure that the officer's statement about the criminal mind is absolutely correct, but I'd argue that the stoner mind is a little easier to decipher. In all likelihood, Jones was probably vacillating between mild paranoia, a desperate craving for Cheetos, and a goofy desire to brag about his incredibly cool new bong.

This little adventure probably won't cost the boys all that much. The three culprits are being held on misdemeanor charges of abuse of a corpse. Still, maybe this will encourage the next gang of would-be bone recyclers to consider a plastic skull kit instead.

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He wishes that India hadn't placed a ban on the exportation of bones; no wonder stoner kids are digging up graveyards!

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Take my beer, really: Beer prices rising on cost of hops

Gary E. Sattler — 2008-05-12T16:15:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food, Shopping

The recent upward surge in commodities prices has left no corner of the globe untouched. That includes the bastions of the beer drinkers.

Changes in global climate, a decline in hops growers and a recent fire in a hops storage facility have worked in concert to reduce the world supply of that most important of beer brewing ingredients. According to a story published by Wired, these events have breweries both large and small adjusting their beer making processes and ingredients in an effort to curb rising brewing costs. The Wired story quotes brew master Donald Gortemiller as saying, "When hops were $2 a pound, compared to $20 or $30 a pound now, it didn't matter. We'd throw them into the boil at various times. That was an inaccurate way of doing things. We're modifying recipes and using about 20 percent less hops."

Walletpop blogger extraordinaire, Bruce Watson recently brought to light the mounting concern over hops deficiencies in the brewisphere. He wrote: "I imagine that the hot nights of a post-global warming future will be particularly unbearable without the benefit of a nice cold one." Bruce has vowed to do everything he can to "Save the Ales." For my part, I have chosen an alternate strategy to Bruce's proactive beer saving efforts. I have surrendered my boarding pass to what was for me; "The one way aluminum train to Stupidville."

Believe me when I say that my self imposed abstinence from beer will leave plenty of the cold foamy beverages for the rest of you to share and enjoy. Let's just hope that the remaining hops growers are the people who are benefiting from these unfortunate beer ingredient price increases.

Price of beer on the rise

Zac Bissonnette — 2008-05-11T15:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Food

Bad news for beer drinkers: rising fuel costs and a rise of more than 300% in the cost of hops have led to a year over year increase of more than 4% in the cost of beer at retail.

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Check out the video from MSNBC for more color.

Here's a quick tip: if a 4% increase in the cost of beer is enough to impact your financial situation, the rising cost of beer is probably the least of your worries. Please seek help immediately.

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If plants have rights, how will this affect the cost of salad?

Geoff Williams — 2008-05-10T16:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Food

My first thought was that if this catches on, food prices are going to go up.

Last month, the Agence-France-Presse, the oldest news agency in the world, reported that the Federal Ethics Committee on Non-Human Gene Technology in Geneva, Switzerland, "condemned the decapitation of flowers without reason." And this week the American press--starting with The Weekly Standard and then Fox News--has been picking up the story.

What really got people talking was that this Swiss governmental ethics committee came up with guidelines to protect "the dignity of plants."
Naturally, some reporters have had a lot of fun reporting about this (and I'm no different). Whether you agree or disagree with the magazine's politics, you have to chuckle at The Weekly Standard's headline, "The Silent Scream of the Asparagus."

Sure, a tree probably doesn't feel embarrassed when someone carves their initials into the trunk or ties a tire swing to one of its branches. I doubt a bush winces when it is pruned, or for that matter, that prunes shriek when they're squeezed into juice. But the committee isn't saying any of that. They're trying to come up with guidelines for researchers who experiment on plants.

They point out that it's within ethical grounds to pull petals off a daisy because of the pure pleasure a human can get from it, and they have no problem with farming (so, phew, this shouldn't be a tip of the iceberg where eventually we're trying to make the wheat is grown comfortably before we harvest it).

In the end, when some people start forest fires with the careless drop of a match, and developers have no problem destroying an aging oak tree because they want space to put a few cars in their parking lot, it probably is pretty silly to ask highly educated scientists to consider how their experiments might be affecting a plant's dignity.

And yet, in this day and age, when urban sprawl seems out of control, when our planet seems to have been industrialized into a giant ball of concrete and chemicals, it seems like it's not a bad idea to discuss anything that might lead to better treatment of plants, and as an extension, our world. In that light, if people want to decide that grains of sand have moral rights, too, and that leads to fewer rusty soda pop cans strewn about at the beach, hey, I'm all for it.

Geoff Williams is a business journalist and the author of C.C. Pyle's Amazing Foot Race: The True Story of the 1928 Coast-to-Coast Run Across America (Rodale).

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Nothing but "brew" skies for beer fans

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-09T13:20:00+00:00

Filed under: Entrepreneurship, Food

File this on under "incredibly obvious million dollar ideas that you wish you'd thought up first."

Having met more than a few true-blue beer hounds in my day, I realize that I am, at best, a novice beer connoisseur. That having been said, I have a few definite preferences, and there's nothing like being able to mosey up to a bar and order my favorites. Unfortunately, however, I often find myself staring down the barrel of a two or three item beer list and wondering if I've somehow been magically whisked away to Mogadishu. Seriously, I understand that not everyone will have Double Black Stout, but can't we do a little better than PBR, Budweiser and Miller Genuine Draft?

Well, my salvation has finally arrived.

Last month, Eric and Will Stephens, a pair of brothers, launched Beermenus. Basically an online restaurant and bar database, Beermenus allows users to check out the beer listings of hundreds of New York watering holes. Visitors can search by brand, restaurant, or neighborhood, and can compare prices at numerous places. They can then check out the restaurants' websites and get directions through Google maps.

Unfortunately, the site is still a little small, offering listings for only 170 bars. Worse yet, it only deals with bars and restaurants in Manhattan, and doesn't even really offer much above 96th Street. On the bright side, though, the brothers Stephens are already working on extending their database, and have plans to explore New York's other boroughs. Ultimately, they want to create Beermenu listings for other cities as well.

In the meantime, I have a friend in San Diego who might be looking for a million dollar idea...

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. Living in Southwest Virginia, he had a friend whose "moonshinemenu" site was a real hoot. It wasn't quite internet-ready, as it was carved on the trunk of a tree...

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Diabetes danger: Back away from the Burger King!

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-08T13:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Food, Home, Health

My wife and I are thinking about moving. As we've been looking at various apartments, we've had to consider the standard questions: how close is it to the subway, what is the nearest hospital, do the drug dealers seem friendly, what's the homicide rate, how many pairs of shoes are dangling from the nearby power lines...

You know, the standard Bronx questions.

One issue that we've never considered is the distance between our home and the nearest McDonald's. However, a recent study has revealed that our proximity to fast-food restaurants and convenience stores might be among the most important considerations when we choose our next home.

Apparently, neighborhoods in which junk food joints outnumber grocery stores exhibit much higher levels of obesity and diabetes than areas where the opposite is the case. This, by the way, is true for all people, regardless of race, social class, and economic position.

The study, conducted by UCLA's Center for Health Policy and a pair of nonprofit health advocacy groups, proposed a new environmental measure: RFEI, or "Retail Food Environmental Index." Basically, RFEI is the total number of fast food restaurants and convenience stores in an area, divided by the the number of grocery stores, supermarkets, farmers' markets, and other fresh produce vendors in the area. The average RFEI in California was 4.5, which means that, for every produce retailer in a Californian's neighborhood, there are 4.5 junk food palaces.

The study showed that California adults who lived in an area with a RFEI of 5 or higher had a 23% greater chance of having diabetes and a 20% greater chance of being obese than those living in an area with an RFEI of 3 or less. Needless to say, junk food purveyors quickly got up in arms, proclaiming that individuals are responsible for their food choices and that "[Suggesting] that living near a quick-service restaurant is a health threat akin to living next to a coal plant is ludicrous."

Personally, I'm not so sure. I used to work near a coal plant, and the filters on the stack meant that I rarely had to deal with any nasty smells or evil particulates. On the other hand, the McDonald's that I had to pass on the way home consistently put out the tantalizing scent of bubbling fries, a health threat that I found much more dangerous. More to the point, my daughter already recognizes the distinctive Dunkin' Donuts logo and she's only two and a half. Like Pavlov's dog, she starts drooling whenever we get within sight of one.

I wonder if I can find an apartment near a farmers' market...

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He carries a portable cattle prod to "gently" remind himself that fast food is bad, bad, bad!

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Large one topping pizza for 23 cents at Papa John's in Cleveland

Josh Smith — 2008-05-08T00:01:00+00:00

Filed under: Food, Daily Deal

When I get fed up with an athlete's performance or complaining about a past game I saddle up to an Internet message board or a stool at the local pub and fire away at the "star". When a major corporation is fed up with a star's complaining, they make t-shirts!

In this case Papa John's Pizza made t -shirts which contained Lebron's number, 23, below the word "crybaby". These shirts were in response to James' complaints of being fouled by a Wizards player early in the series. The humorous shirts were sold by a Washington D.C. area Papa John's before game 6 last Friday. The shirts which turned up in Cleveland had little effect on the Cavaliers who went on to win the game.After I bad mouth a star athlete the most I have to do is calm down a local fanboy who adores him or her, corporations like Papa John's on the other hand have to work a bit harder to make amends. As a way of apologizing to Cleveland and Cavaliers fans, Papa John's Pizza will be offering a large one topping pizza to Cleveland residents on Thursday May 8th for just 23 cents! Papa John's is going further to try and assuage LeBron lovers by donating an additional $10,000 to the Cavaliers Youth Fund.

If you are planning to score an apology pizza today, I would suggest you call early and plan to pick it up since even those who could care less about basketball will likely be jumping on this HOT deal. If you live outside of Cleveland, Ohio then it doesn't look like you will be able to take part in this, but if you call up your local Papa John's Pizza and start crying maybe they will feel sorry and let you in on the peacemaking offer. Finally, don't take out any aggression from the incident on the individual who will be preparing your food out of sight!

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Zapping weenies, Frankenstein-style

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-07T15:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food

I first learned to cook when I was in Boy Scouts, which means that, in addition to learning how to use a stove, I also learned how to cook over a fire, in a homemade sterno oven, in a solar cooker, and in a variety of other bizarre ways. Given my eclectic culinary education, I thought that I knew every way that a hot dog could possibly be prepared.

I was wrong.

At Maker Faire 2008, a sort of science fair for grown-ups, the Nevada Lightning Laboratory used a couple of Tesla coils to cook a string of hot dogs. In addition to effectively heating up the weenies, the Tesla coils also wowed the audience by shooting out huge arcs of electricity, causing sparks to shoot between the dogs. While this might not be the most effective or cheapest way to cook, it is definitely the coolest.

These 10-foot coils were 1/12-size prototypes of a massive coil that the laboratory hopes to erect. Not only will this amazing device delight geeks and mad scientists everywhere, but it will also provide a platform for lightning experiments.

And, of course, it will be a really nifty hot dog cooker!

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He once considered the mechanics of jamming a hot dog into an electrical socket, but chickened out at the last minute.

Inside a cash register-free business

Brandon Barker — 2008-05-07T14:30:00+00:00

Filed under: Entrepreneurship, Food, Shopping, Simplification

The City Café Bakery in downtown Kitchener, Ontario serves hot coffee, bagels, croissants, tarts and brick oven pizza with a quirky, outgoing staff and a neighborhood atmosphere. However, it does not have a cash register.

According to Bakers Journal, owner John Bergen, a former ceramics designer, wanted to open a bakery where he could "walk in anytime and it's a place where I can belong." For Bergen, that kind of business would involve simplicity and the honor system.

Bergen says. "What irritated me about going into [other bakeries], for example, was waiting in line for something as simple as getting a donut and a coffee. So the thought was, someone can pour his own coffee, grab his own bagel, cut it himself, throw the money in, and walk out. We don't touch 60% of the transaction."

Customers order their items, tally up the total and put their money in a fare box from an old bus. To make things simpler, prices are rounded off to the nearest quarter with taxes included. They do not take credit cards.

Every six months they check the numbers, and only once did they come up short. But, Bergen believes that customers are more likely to overpay than underpay. "Some people come in and want a $2.75 loaf of bread," he says, "but they see we're busy so they throw $3 in and walk out." The City Café Bakery also discourages tipping and they don't answer their phone, so that customers won't have to wait for service while an employee is on the phone. Woo hoo!

But, how's business? According to Bergen, every week the City Café Bakery dishes out 3,000 bagels, 1,300 croissants, 1,000 desserts, and an untold number of pizzas, sandwiches and loaves of bread.

Not too shabby.

B. Brandon Barker also writes for Political Machine.

[Thanks to Kottke.org]

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The sap is up! Spring puddings for your longing

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-06T16:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Food

Ironically, just as Jello sometimes reminds me of breasts, the opposite happened when I saw these Japanese breast puddings: I started thinking about spring puddings.

While bread pudding is among the greatest winter desserts and Indian pudding has a definite lock on the autumn, spring is the time for smooth, lightly-sweetened custards, preferably served with berries and mint. As I recently saw fresh berries in my local market, it's quite possible that the Japanese boob custards might have had absolutely nothing to do with my recent craving for spring puddings. At least, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

While the ultimate spring pudding (and fall pudding, and winter pudding, and summer pudding, and anytime pudding) is creme brulee, it is also really time-consuming to make, and requires a fair knowledge of proper blowtorch usage.A far easier dessert is panna cotta. Rather than using eggs to create a jiggly texture, panna cotta uses gelatin, which makes it much simpler and less time-consuming to prepare. While it is traditionally served outside of its mold, you can also serve it in its ramekin, particularly if you're in a hurry.

This recipe makes four servings of a basic, all-purpose panna cotta. It can be easily multiplied, is a snap to prepare, and tastes great with pretty much any fresh berry. If you wish, you can omit the vanilla, which will let the pure flavor of the cream shine through. Alternately, you can experiment with other flavorings, like coffee, orange extract, and so forth.

Enjoy!

Panna Cotta
1 teaspoon unflavored gelatin (Knox is a good brand)
1/4 cup whole milk
1 1/4 cups whipping cream
2 tablespoons sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
Fresh berries (optional)
Fresh mint leaves (optional)

In a medium bowl, sprinkle the gelatin over the milk. Let stand for two minutes, then whisk together. In a saucepan over medium heat, combine cream and sugar. Cook, stirring to dissolve sugar, until small bubbles appear around edges of pan. Slowly add cream mixture to gelatin mixture, stirring until smooth. Add vanilla. Divide among 4 four-ounce ramekins. Cover and refrigerate for 4+ hours, or until firm.

To de-mold: fill a small bowl with hot water. Dip ramekins in water, being careful to avoid sloshing water into the panna cotta. Run a knife around the edge of the ramekin, invert onto a dessert plate, and garnish with berries and mint leaves.

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He sometimes serves panna cotta with a single fresh raspberry balanced in the center of each perfect, jiggling globe. Then his wife hits him.

The latest comfort food from Japan: Breast pudding

Bruce Watson — 2008-05-06T15:00:00+00:00

Filed under: Extracurriculars, Food

Watch it wiggle, see it jiggle, cool and fruity...

Being a double-entendre type of guy, I always loved the Jello commercials. After all, I grew up in the early days of "jiggle television," when wiggling and jiggling usually meant just one thing: breasts. In retrospect, I wonder if this wasn't an unspoken subtext of Jello's ad campaign. After all, while the giggly, wiggly gelatin was sure to capture the attention of children, the unspoken reference to female pulchritude might have been useful for drawing in a more adult segment of the population.

Regardless, I recently discovered that I wasn't the only one who drew a connection between the creamy wondrousness of pudding and the creamy wondrousness of mammalian protuberances. A Japanese company has released breast puddings. Sold two to a package, the jiggly treats are gelatinous, milky sweet, and are marketed with cartoons of bubbly, happy ladies. They retail for between 380 and 400 yen, or roughly $4 per package.

In case you're not inclined toward math, that also works out to approximately $2 per breast, which is a pretty good deal.

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. For some reason, boob pudding makes him think of Spring...

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