Disney World (and I can't believe I'm writing this) was once the ultimate family destination for many of my friends. I can specifically enumerate examples of friends for whom a Disney World vacation was such an important life event, they planned future childbearing and other major personal decisions around the family trip -- and, what's more, planned the trip more than a year in advance. Disney World has been, for many families, truly a signal that they've arrived as consumers of American culture.

For this year already, 10% fewer families have arrived. Disney earnings, released a few weeks ago, indicated that visits to its iconic amusement parks were down 10% this year. And, indeed, the stock has been depressed as investors expect "Armageddon at the parks." The fact is that families strapped for cash to heat their homes and buy groceries are probably going to avoid the indulgent and expensive family vacations. The coming credit card meltdown is sure to put a dent in families' ability to use credit card points for "Disney Rewards," as well as reducing the main way many people finance their magical vacations. And these days? Conspicuous consumption is over; and enjoying your family is coming back.

If Disney World is out, public parks are in.

My wife and I have differing philosophies when it comes to Christmas cards; she likes to choose beautiful cards and send them to everyone we know, whereas I look for cards in bulk and try to shave the list down each year. Because of my Christmas card habits and the fact that I am constantly turning off the tree to save electricity, I've been dubbed "The Grinch" in our household. But this year my "heart grew 3 times larger" when my wife shared her new idea to save money on sending out cards!

Amber had a great idea, to write out all of our cards before we go to Thanksgiving celebrations this week so that we can hand them out when we see our families on Thursday. Since my parent's families are large enough that they could each field their own football team, we'll save quite a bit on postage. We'll also be handing out cards to friends as we get together over the next month, rather than having the mailman deliver them.

The Post Office will still be delivering cards to people who live far away, but we'll be hand delivering close to 80% of our cards. On top of saving over $20 in postage, hand delivering the cards is another great excuse to catch up with friends and family. If you plan to save postage this year, you only have a few days left so you better get writing!

The holiday season is already upon us, a reminder that those of us who need to purchase gifts should get our butts in gear unless navigating a packed mall is our idea of a good time.

While Black Friday is a the most publicized shopping day of the year and still one of the best times to pick up deals on electronics, friends-and-family events remain one of my favorite times to buy gifts. Traditionally shoppers would have to spend precious time making new friends and rekindling old relationships to get invitations to special friends-and-family events, but the Internet has changed all of that.

The users over at Slickdeals.net have taken it upon themselves to pull together the most detailed list of friends-and-family deals to help you to get the most bang for your buck!

Here are a few of the "Friends and Family" offers currently available.

• Beauty.com
• Bloomingdale's
• Sears
• Eddie Bauer
• Banana Republic, Gap, Old Navy
• Christmas Tree Shops
• Cole Haan
• Cost Plus
• Crazy 8
• Gymboree
• Harry and David
• Joann
• Kmart
• Kohls
• Lane Bryant
• Mandalay Bay
• Sephora.com
• The Limited

There are already over 20 stores offering discounts to friends and family members, with discounts ranging from 10 to 50% off! The full details for these deals, as well as coupons, are available at Slickdeals.net.

Many of these friends-and-family offers can be used online as well as in your local store. Be sure to check the restrictions and times as most of these deals are only good for a few days in November. Additionally some stores, like Sears, have a special after-hour's event just for friends and family. Finally, don't worry about making up an employee name to whom you are third cousin twice removed; once you have the coupon, the stores couldn't care less how you got it.

I consider myself to be a good daughter, spouse and friend, but apparently there is plenty of room for improvement. For example, my mom always complains that I never call her and when I do, it's only for five minutes before I have to rush out the door. My husband wonders what it will take to get me to go to a hockey game with him. My grandfather asks when I'll have time to help him set up online banking on his newfangled computer. So this Christmas, I've decided to make all their wishes come true with the use of some personalized coupons.

Instead of buying items, I'm giving a set of six personalized "I Promise To..." coupons each to my parents, husband and good friends. My mom will get the "....make a 60-minute call this weekend at your convenience" package. My husband will get an assortment pack with promises like "....attend a social event of your choice," "....do a chore that you usually do," and "....give a 30-minute back rub after a hard day at work." Friends will get coupons for a round of drinks at the bar, and promises to be a companion to that art event or concert no on else wants to go. And yes, Grandpa can cash in his coupon for online banking services and any other tech support he needs.

I designed simple coupons on Microsoft Word, but placed them in shiny envelopes, the only cash I'll spend on the gifts, for a glitzy touch. You can print out already-formatted coupons -- and get some more "I Promise To..." ideas -- on the web, like at GiveCoupons.com. I decided not to put an expiration date on mine, although I hope my recipients decide not to cash them in all at once. Still, I'm thinking these types of coupons are more meaningful and valuable than a gift card to Borders or BestBuy. And it's a great way to ease both my guilt and the hit on my credit card over the holidays.

Despite my Ivy League MBA and my role as a founder of a personal finance web site, I haven't done much in the way of planning my financial situation. All of my financial milestones in the past decade or so have been accidental, serendipitous, or just a gut response to a disaster.

I was pregnant pretty much the moment after I was engaged, at 28. Through the birth of three boys (all of which came along a little sooner than I expected), I worked in a unusual career that I made up out of whole cloth, starting out in dotcom operations management, finance and product development and ending as a professional blog producer. While it paid fairly well, it did not pay nearly as well as the jobs of my business school peers; and it became very difficult to make extra room in my budget to pay my huge student loan payments. Instead of paying down my student loans, I've only compounded them.

One thing I did brilliantly was to buy a house in an up-and-coming neighborhood immediately upon getting pregnant with my first child, and never refinancing it. Buying it was a gut reaction to the nesting hormones, but it turned out wonderfully. Four years later a Starbucks went in two blocks away, and my home's value doubled. Early on, I took out a home equity loan to (hiding my head in shame) pay for our wedding; I'm thankful I never refinanced the house, keeping my ARM that was garnered at the peak of my credit score. While I was seriously guilty of living outside of my means as a young bride and mama, after I became pregnant with my second son I buttoned down the hatches, canceling all my credit cards and vowing to live on what I made.

That one really good decision -- never to refinance my mortgage -- has paid off with a low-ish monthly payment and a fast-reducing principal balance. And with my new philosophy of "no debt no way never," I know at least I won't be facing a tough credit review at my local bank.

Ken and Daria Dolan, America's First Family of Personal Finance, answer your money questions every Friday.

Click here to ask Ken and Daria your question.

Dear Ken and Daria,

A family member has asked me for a loan. Is this a good idea, and what is the best way to go about it?

-Marion

Would you -- should you -- lend money to a family member or friend in need? During these tough economic times, you may be asked to be "bankers" for someone going through a period of unemployment or having trouble making ends meet. While we know you want to help, it's important not to let your heart overrule good sense.

This is a big step that could cause future problems and we want you to protect yourself. Let's talk about what you need to consider before making your decision, and how to loan money the right way.

A written agreement can help protect you from future problems when loaning money to family members. Get started with Ken and Daria's sample loan note, available only at Dolans.com.

It's hard to imagine the degree to which the internet and personal computers have changed photography. Once upon a time (about ten years ago), hard copy photos were treasured keepsakes. They were irreplaceable, and families would often come together or fall apart over the distribution of favorite snapshots.

In my house, this was a particularly difficult thing. After my parents died, some of my relatives descended upon my family's collection of old pictures and, under the pretense of "making copies," began to abscond with original photos. I managed to hold onto a few keepsakes, but many of my originals have become lost to the fleet fingers of fellow family historians.

Two generations ago most families lived on working farms. All family members participated in the work and had responsibilities. School was designed to give the children the summer off primarily because they were needed on the farm to help with the planting and harvest of crops. Children had responsibilities and a role in the family.

Fast forward to the present. Most families no longer live in the country and in too many homes children have no real work to do. With the advent of TV in the 50's, an amazing change happened to the role of children in this country: their primary role became "a consumer."

This change began gradually with Saturday morning cartoons and cereal commercials. These cereal ads were really the first attempt to market directly to kids. Perhaps you remember them? Cereal with submarines and other toys in the box so the kids beg, cried, and screamed until their parents bought it.

The Daily Deal for Sunday, July 6, 2008

Camping season is in full swing, and that always gets my blood up for looking at the newest and best camping gear available. Although I don't tent camp any more, there was a time when I did pitch a tent in the woods at least once every camping season. There's just nothing which compares to tent camping. I've always liked to think that we tent campers are a special breed of outdoors people.

I recently ran across a gem of a deal on the Coleman 3-room Weathermaster tent. The good folks over at Campmor.com are offering this awesome cabin type tent for just $159.97 plus a shipping charge as low as $6.95. This great tent, which is able to sleep up to 8 adults, normally retails for $230. You can use the included hanging dividers to separate the interior of the tent into three rooms, and the tent comes factory prepared for inclement weather.

Large, light, and tight, is the way I describe a tent such as this. If you're in the market for a family camping tent which won't bust your budget, this is a great place to start. If you do find that this tent will fulfill your tent camping needs, might I also recommend that you purchase the ground moisture barrier and get yourself some extra metal tent stakes also. The moisture barrier will help to reduce the clammy feeling that can develop within a tent, and the metal tent stakes always worked better for me in a greater variety of soils and situations.

It's time to get yourself outfitted and get into the woods. There is much to do and learn in the great outdoors. Even if you just use it as an opportunity to "escape" from the daily grind for just a little while, I promise you that tent camping will give you a different perspective on the world. It's a perspective that most people, unfortunately, miss out on.

A good friend and coworker of mine was having trouble finding the right Mother's day gift for his mom. He dearly loves the lady, and wanted to get or do something very special for her. His problem was that available cash was in short supply. After careful consideration he came up with the perfect Mother's Day gift.

He shaved off his beard and cut his hair, something she had been asking him to do for a number of years. His mom is joyous about the change.

I think I'm safe in saying that most mothers couldn't care less about whether or not we spend any money on commemorating their government-declared special day. Moms want sincere hugs and kisses. They want babbling grandchildren close at hand. They want their hands held firmly as you tell them how special they are to you. They want to know how the lessons they taught you still serve as guides in your daily life. Moms invest their whole lives in their kids. The dividends of motherhood should be just as sincere.

This post is part of a series about real-life signs we're in a recession.

I was pregnant with my first son, Everett, when my family bought a membership to the Oregon Zoo. Here in Portland, obstetricians actually suggest eager moms-to-be walk up and down the hills at the zoo when they're trying to stimulate contractions.

It didn't work much, but it started a family connection to the zoo (and hilariously, a baby mountain goat was born the same day as Everett), and now that we have three children, we've upgraded to the most serious membership of all. My husband's favorite thing to do with the children is to get on the bus (we've given up our family car) and take the boys to see animals. With the $100 annual membership, all our visits are free but for snacks.

Ahem. But for snacks. Visits have been few and far between lately, because the snacks at the zoo now seem so expensive. Even though the baby doesn't ask for elephant ears, buying even one treat for every family member with a full set of teeth can set us back $20 -- more than our typical family grocery budget for a day (and we haven't had a zip of nutrition, in all likelihood). I don't mind packing snacks for the boys to go on an afternoon excursion (especially if that leaves me home alone in peace), but have you ever taken a five-year-old and three-year-old to the zoo and refused to buy them the treats offered at every turn? Umm-hmmm. Avoiding the "gimmes" when we truly can't afford to satisfy them is the reason we now spend a lot more of our entertainment time enjoying the wildlife in our own backyard.

Back in the early nineties, "Food Stamp menus" were en vogue, and the newsgroups and early web sites were full of ideas (of course it wouldn't hurt to pay a few dollars for the knowledge!). Cynthia Hillson, then a mother of five living outside of Charlotte, North Carolina, was one of the first to happen upon this concept: that feeding a large family could be cheaper, if you'd only plan carefully and follow a list of rules. The Hillbilly Housewife is just one similar concept that has sprouted into web being since.

In the time since the late 1980s, when Cynthia's husband lost his job and took one making less than $30,000 a year, she's birthed one more child and the cost of groceries has risen immensely. Instead of attaching a weekly cost to feeding a family (in 1991, it was $45), now Cynthia is just focused on the process, and her self-published book is called "How to Feed Your Family." She sells it for $8.00 and encourages readers to make photocopies to share with their friends and church groups. She sent me a review copy and, after reading her perky, practical advice I've decided to send her a check; her advice is way undersold. Were she vastly more polished and a bit more savvy with sustainability, she'd be travelling the country with Michael Pollan.

In this slim stack of three-hole-punched pages, Hillson sets forth strategies right out of In Defense of Food (without any of the science, most of the background, nor the elegance). Sure, she skips some of the parts I find important in my family food plan (she dismisses organic food as too expensive and gives up on gardening as not worth the effort), but many of the vital strategies are there.

Anyone who has ever loaned money to a friend or family member is likely going to tell you to never do it. No matter how you go about doing it, a loan between friends or family always seems to end badly.

Consider my personal experience with this issue: Friends were desperate for money and I contemplated whether or not I could help. We had discussed money issues in the past, and had agreed that as long as financial transactions were treated "as business" and as long as all parties were honest, money wouldn't come between a friendship.

I loaned my friends the money they needed with a loan agreement laying out the payment terms. When the time came to pay, they didn't pay. We discussed new payment terms, and a new loan agreement was drawn up to reflect the new terms. And again they didn't pay.

My brother started a family two years after I did, which was sensible: I'm the oldest sibling. Then my sister-in-law and I got pregnant within a week of each other last fall, but it wasn't until early spring we learned that we were both going to have three children come summer; she was pregnant with twins! My brother and I are both the primary breadwinners in our family, too -- let's just say my sister-in-law and I don't often go out for pedicures. Yesterday we gathered with all the babies and the talk turned to money.

With years of balancing children one one income, and six adorable, expensive kids between us, what advice would we give to someone planning for several years of at-home parenting? When a local mama-to-be asked the question "how should I budget for life as a stay-at-home mom?", I discovered nuggets from our community and from our own experiences. Here are seven things I'd remember if I could go back to the first-time-pregnant me and do-over:

The headline could read, "Move over Supermom: The tale of the übermom." Or maybe, "Super (simple) Mom is new maternal 'It' Girl." In today's New York Times, the profile of Shannon Hayes is full of generosity, nuance, and flaw; she's a representative of the mother who chooses to trade a power suit for cast-off jeans, to home school her children, to eschew plastics, to recycle and compost everything, to live more simply. She's also a representative of the women who can't do it all (her fridge isn't sparkling, she doesn't fold her clean laundry).

All that aside, her lifestyle is appealing to those who would Live More Simply. She raises her own food and her family barters its chickens for handmade pottery. She and her husband don't work conventional jobs, choosing instead to spend plenty of time with their two young daughters and evangelizing the sustainable lifestyle; to butcher and sell their fancy organic lamb.

When I see an article like this, the question that always springs to my mind is, could I do this? And, hand-in-hand, how much does it cost?