Back in July, I wrote a piece about the yellow pages for a series on things that are disappearing in America. That article brought a fair amount of criticism from industry insiders who said the business was thriving, and that if you include usage of online yellow pages, the business was actually growing. There were some business owners who said the yellow pages were vital to them. And there were plenty of us who said we have no use for the book (or the online yellow pages, for that matter).

A recent article in the Wall Street Journal supports my theory that the yellow pages business is dying a slow and painful death. When it became clear that the Internet was capturing some of their former users, the publishers of the directories started creating online yellow pages. That helped some, but apparently not enough.

One analyst says that spending on advertising in the print and online versions of the yellow pages will fall over 6% next year. That's twice as much as the expected decline in television advertising. The spending in the printed directories is expected to fall 39% over the next four years. Ouch.

BT Group had grand plans to get rid of the iconic British red phone box, but for some reason it never banked on the Brits' sense of nostalgia. The company wanted to get rid of about 4,500 of its remaining 12,000 red phone booths, saying that the boxes weren't profitable anymore in this age of ubiquitous cell-phone use.

But after the uproar the announcement caused, the company grudgingly agreed to let villages and townships keep their beloved red boxes by "adopting" them for about £1 (about $1.80). Of course, that was for the box. Not a working phone inside.

A working phone costs extra -- an annual fee of £500 (about $900).

I'm bothered when I hear someone deprecate a smoker, perhaps standing beside the door of an office building in a sleet storm, puffing away madly. Reformed smokers (such as me) are often the worst critics, asking with a smug self-righteousness just what it will take to convince the sad sack to finally quit.

Certainly high prices (you think gas has gone up? Look at cigarettes), smoking area restrictions and public scorn don't outweigh nicotine addiction for many. Why is it we don't sympathize with those unable to evade the drug's powerful clutches?

With smokes running $4.50 a pack in many places, a two-pack-a-day smoker (note: most smokers understate the amount they smoke) has a $56 a week, $2,912 a year monkey on his/her back. If the smoker were to quit and put the same amount in savings, in 30 years he/she could accumulate $168,761.82 before taxes. Quitting would also open more job opportunities, as some companies are unwilling to hire what they perceive (wrongly) employees who would incur more health plan charges.

What many younger people fail to understand is just how thoroughly we were brainwashed in the 50's and 60's about the benefits of smoking; relaxation, sophistication, sexiness. There was no depth to which the companies would not stoop, from coupons redeemable for gifts (and no, the rumor that an iron lung was one of the gifts was not true) to contests with magnificent prices, to coerce us to smoke.

The Marlboro Man and various celebrities pitched the cancer sticks like they were love and success wrapped in paper. Advertising works, and with the best and brightest minds dedicated to putting a Lucky in our lungs, I think its sad that we disdain those who fell for it. They deserve our sympathy.

I can't think of a better example of tobacco's determination to plant the smoking seed in even the youngest viewer than this ad from the stone age of television.

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The next time you rent a car from Hertz, you might notice something strange: in addition to the spare tire, first aid kit and jumper cables that you'd expect to find in your car's trunk, there will probably also be a printed trunk liner, covered in garish advertisements.

In case you miss the point, the fine folks at your favorite rental company will reinforce it with advertisements printed all over your ticket folder and further product placements dangling from your rear-view mirror. You might be inclined to wonder if you mistakenly picked up the NASCAR special or, perhaps, hit a billboard on your way out of the parking lot. In point of fact, however, you are merely enjoying the effects of Hertz's latest revenue stream.

The gas crisis has hit rental companies particularly hard. With oil prices regularly setting new records, many people have elected to forgo vacations; even those who have decided to leave town are maximizing their use of public transportation. Added to this, the increasing cost of gasoline has pushed the high price of rental-company fill-ups into the stratosphere. Eager to preserve its customer base, Hertz has already done away with its high-priced fill-ups; nowadays, people returning Hertz rental cars with empty tanks can expect to pay market rate for their gas. Even this customer-loyalty move, however, hasn't been enough to help the rental company weather the gas spike. Consequently, the company has followed the lead of many airlines and is using every available opportunity to sell advertisements.

As far as I'm concerned, if it helps Hertz keep the prices down, I am happy to have my suitcases co-habitate with ads for Reese's cups and Geico insurance!

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He's wondering how much the rental on an Oscar Meyer Weinermobile would be.

For a couple of months, I worked for an outdoor advertising firm. The company employed close to 300 people, all of whom were tasked with selling and installing advertising in malls, airports, bus kiosks, and other high-traffic venues. The upshot of this is that I, like everyone else on the planet, still ignore public advertising, although I now check out the frames to see if they were installed by my company.

I'm not entirely sure that advertising works in any form, but I'm convinced that most of the current methods are completely bankrupt. Unless I'm specifically looking for something, I rarely notice billboards, newspaper ads, posters, direct-mail cards, and all the other tools that companies spend billions on in their search for my money. Unlike many people, I do watch commercials, but that is largely because I love the funny little movies. My favorite ad right now is the cat herder one that ran a few years back. I still can't remember the name of the company that it advertised.

Recently, I was impressed by the innovative advertising method that Radu Nicolau used. Currently running for mayor of a small town in Romania, Nicolau decided that, rather than pay for billboards or other expensive advertising methods, he would simply catch stray dogs, dress them in little posters that say "Vote for Radu Nicolau," and let them go. Sure, some people have complained about Nicolau's method, but I think that this is pure brilliance. Not only is it a memorable ad, but it also highlights a problem that the town's next mayor should probably address. After all, packs of stray dogs can't be a good thing.

The vacant lot next door has a lot of stray cats. I wonder if I can get the little darlings to hold still while I squeeze them into PETA t-shirts...

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He's already tried to get the stray cats to dress up in billboards advertising the local Chinese restaurant, but was subsequently accused of being a cat-tle rustler.

Times Square is a marketer's dream, a place where loud, garish advertisements have become a world renowned tourist attraction. John Woods takes us on a tour of Times Square to share what goes into the advertisements we see lighting up the area around 42nd St. each night.

Aside from the number of LED lights used to display the Coca-Cola billboard, I found it interesting to find out that the owner of 1 Times Square doesn't have any tenants! He makes enough money through selling advertisements which run for $300,000 per month.

At rates like that, anyone who took advantage of the recent Mother's Day free advertising promotion on Times Square billboards certainly got their money's worth.


A tour of Times Square from Keyframe on Vimeo.

With gas prices so high that it seems like it costs $40 just to get to the next gas station, alternatives must be considered. Rollerblades and bicycles aren't good for long distance commutes, and getting a horse might annoy the neighborhood association. One alternative: make your car into a billboard, and get paid hundreds of dollars to promote everything from insurance to energy drinks.

But according to a 2005 Bankrate article, the industry is rife with scams. Never work with a company that asks for an up-front fee, and be wary of big promises: no one is going to give you a car. Be realistic. Given high gas prices, there are a lot of people who would love to turn their cars into billboards, and your chances of getting picked are slim.

But it may be worth a try. One of the reputable companies in this field is FreeCar Media. Here's their pitch:

FreeCar is advertising supported. Advertisers choose the drivers they want based on the information you provide us. You will never have to pay a cent to participate in the program.

When you are chosen, your vehicle will be wrapped in an attractive advertisement and you will get paid up to $900 a month. Most programs average 3 months but some are longer and others shorter.

If you want to give it a shot, fill out the application here, and they'll contact you when they need drivers in your area.

Ads are everywhere and if you haven't noticed, they usual exist in a happy sunshiny world, while most of us don't. Whether they make you laugh, smile or feel attracted to someone you just found out existed, they generally make you feel good. But is this always a good idea?

Cynthia Cryder of Carnegie Mellon University has found that being sad can increase a person's willingness to pay for an item. ScienCentral explains that people who felt sad or bad about themselves are willing to pay an average of almost 300% more than a control group when they were offered a water bottle. Cryder theorizes that people who feel bad about themselves value themselves (and things associated with themselves) lower and other things higher. This causes them to pay more for a water bottle that they don't already own.

What does this mean? Do people find 'sporty water bottles' comforting? Probably not, but you might want to rethink that shopping spree you were going to use to cheer yourself up. If people really take this study to heart we could see a bizarre world where advertisers replace images of attractive, smiling people with more depressing images in an attempt to squeeze every last dollar out of the consumer. First they make you feel bad about yourself, then they try to sell you something. Is this how self-help authors make such a killing?

While many people blog just for fun, for others, this is serious business. There are blogs that are easily recognized as business ventures (like this one). And there are many that maybe aren't so quickly dubbed to be commercial enterprises.

"Mommy blogging" is one of the fastest-growing an most popular sections of the blogosphere. What is it? It's exactly what it sounds like: Mommies blogging about their lives. Many of them are doing it because they want to engage with others about the life of a mother and wife.

And others are doing it as a business venture. Advertisers have zeroed in on the mommy blogging culture and are spending big bucks to get exposure to the audiences of these blogs. They say that "word of mom" is one of the best marketing tools a company can have. And blogging can be very lucrative for the chosen few, who can rake in six figures if their audiences are big enough. Dooce is one example of a mommy-blogger gone nova.

Here's more about the business of mommy blogging from earlier this week on The Today Show.


Tracy L. Coenen, CPA, MBA, CFE performs fraud examinations and financial investigations for her company Sequence Inc. Forensic Accounting, and is the author of Essentials of Corporate Fraud.

Is nothing sacred?

Madison Ave. apparently doesn't think so.

A special-effects entrepreneur has come up with a way to fill the sky with lush clouds as large as 4 feet across shaped like corporate logos, according to Wired. He calls them Flogos. Great. How clever.

Francisco Guerra, who's also a former magician, has developed a machine that produces tiny bubbles filled with air and some helium, forms the foam into shapes and pumps them into the sky.

You'd think a magician would know better. Aren't they supposed to hold the imagination sacred?

Naturally that biggest corporate dream maker - The Walt Disney Co. will use one of the machines next month to send clouds shaped like Mickey Mouse heads into the air at Walt Disney World in Orlando, Fla., Guerra told Wired.

After that, no doubt, the floodgates will be open. No more laying on a grassy knoll picking out whales and cars and palm tree-shaped clouds with your kids or partner. It'll be "Hey! It's Coke!" or, "Look Mommy, Apple Computers!"

May the winds of change blow fiercely.

Mexicans working in the U.S. no longer have to wait in boredom while their phone calls home from New York connect. Companies like VoodooDox (owned by Disney and others) are selling advertising to fill those idle seconds.

Unfortunately, the marketing seems to work. According to Advertising Age, 12% or more of the time callers respond to the whispered pitches for products such as money wiring (callers are prompted to press "1" if they want more info on the product advertised). Among the clients that use the service are radio stations, to torment callers waiting on the line to win free tickets to a concert.

I lump this together with spam, telemarketing and door-to-door solicting as types of marketing for which we can only blame ourselves. These would disappear overnight if we simply didn't respond. If we do respond to this new ad type, guess what? On-hold times will just increase, more time to wring a buck from our wallets.

So, if you find yourself being pitched in this way while on hold, do us all a favor and stick your hand in your pocket.

Though most Americans consider themselves pretty astute when it comes to brands, how many of them actually know where their favorite brands are based? I know, it's kind of baffling. Kind of like the title of this post.

Take Volvo, for instance. Everyone knows Volvo is a Swedish. The company has been based in Gothenburg since it was founded in 1927. However, technically, it's an American-owned company since Ford bought it in 1999.

And how about your local filling station. Did you know that Shell Oil is a Dutch company? Maybe you did. And how about good old American 7-Eleven? Yep, Japanese.

Before I give the whole thing away, you can take the country-of-origin quiz yourself. It's really tough, so don't say I didn't warn you.

B. Brandon Barker also writes for Political Machine.

As I write this, the Boston Marathon is in full swing, and the crowds are cheering, as runners from around the world compete in the nation's oldest annual marathon. But a few people in the crowd are shouting, clapping and whistling louder than ever: corporate sponsors.

Hard as it may be to believe, until today, the Boston Marathon hasn't allowed advertising anywhere near their race. Not visible advertising, that is. They've had corporate sponsorship for some time, but it was always quiet and dignified. It still is.

Today, the only change is that there will be visible ads at the start and finish of the race, for the two biggest corporate sponsors: John Hancock Financial Services and Adidas AG, the German sports equipment and apparel maker. And there will be ads at the press bridge and the sides of the VIP sitting area. But will the dignified nature of corporate sponsorship last?

The first thing that struck me--halfway through AOL Money & Finance's Corporate Logo Quiz--was the realization that, wow, I really know corporate logos.

For someone who doesn't pay attention to the subtle evolutions of the GE, Disney or BMW branding, it turns out that I actually know them like the back of my hand. And, for some reason, that makes me very afraid.

But before you launch into the quiz, take a deep breath and try to relax, because it's not as easy as you think. Like, for instance, do the sun rays in the Dole logo stretch outside the "o" or stay inside? Is the familiar Pepsi globe red-on-blue or blue-on-red? Does the circular Starbucks logo actually have stars in it? How many circles are in the Target "target"? Does the Playboy bunny have a outlined or solid-white tie?

See? You're hooked.

B. Brandon Barker also writes for Political Machine.