Following the example set by several European cities, Washington D.C. has launched a Smart Bike program with an American twist. The program, operated by JCDecaux, which operates a similar program in Paris with a fleet of 10,000 bikes, is a combined effort of the city's Department of Transportation and Clear Channel, which controls the ad business of Washington's mass transit shelters.

Riders pay a $40 annual membership fee to gain the right to use one of the 120 bikes stored at 10 locations around town convenient to bus and train stations. They are issued a card that will open the lock securing the Smart Bike in its storage rack. Members may keep the bikes for up to three hours, at which time they must be returned to a Smart Bike location. Riders may then immediately borrow another bike, though. The rental doesn't include either helmet or lock, however, and riders are liable for the cost of lost or stolen bikes at $550. Ouch!

The bikes are configured for city riding, with fenders, luggage rack, lights, and a skirts-friendly frame. Washington is known for its network of bike paths, so such a system might be a more efficient way to get around than trying to find parking hither and yon while running one's errands.

JCDecaux's European fleets offer even more sophisticated touches, such as Bluetooth connectivity to the rider's cell phone, providing real-time suggested route info and bike return locations. Look for such systems to appear in more U.S. high-density communities if the D.C. experience works out.

Also read:

Bicycle communting not without its problems

How about a pedicab?

It's interesting to think about how cities compete for tourists. Apart from spending billions of dollars on advertising, fighting to host World's Fairs and the Olympics, and desperately organizing major events, almost every aspect of a city's infrastructure could be seen as part of a bid for the tourist buck. Police? Handy for keeping the tourists safe. Public transportation? Offers a cheap way for the tourists to get around. Sports teams? Keeps the tourists happy while they're here and gives them handy souvenirs to take home!

I thought about this recently when I read about the town of Zheleznovodsk, Russia. Home to the Mashuk-Akva Term spa, the town seems to have long been casting about for a sense of identity. On the one hand, it is noted for the healing powers of its mineral springs; then again, so are many other towns in the Caucasus Mountains region, where it is located. Not long ago, it hit on the idea of using the iconic enema, the delivery system for many of its healing mineral treatments, as a sign of its civic pride. The first step was posters that stated "Let's beat constipation and sloppiness with enemas!" The signs hung in the local spa and garnered a fair bit of attention.

Buoyed by the success of their enema poster campaign, the spa commissioned a sculpture. Costing $42,000, Mashuk-Akva's enema statue shows an 800-pound bronze bulb-style enema being carried by three Botticelli-esque angels. While the sculptor admits to a certain irony in her finished work, the director of the spa considers it to be an utterly non-ironic symbol of the region. It remains to be seen if Zheleznovodsk's new sculpture will become a cultural icon or will end up being a washout. Regardless, the next time I take a trip, I'm going to give a long, hard look at Russia, the land of the golden enema!

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. The more he thinks about it, the more he's impressed with Zheleznovodsk. Come to think of it, maybe New York needs an enema!

What are the most important considerations when one is choosing a place to live? Obviously, recreation is a consideration, as is safety, but what else goes into the list? Does your ideal area have museums and libraries? Parks and bodies of water? How about diverse ethnic populations and a wide selection of restaurants?

While considerations like a country's level of happiness or its willingness to support slackers certainly have an impact upon its overall desirability, other factors definitely come into play. With this in mind, Mercer Consulting has developed an index that rates the safety and liveability of 215 cities across the world. According to them, the top-ranked city in the world is Zurich, followed by Vienna, Geneva, Vancouver, and Auckland, and the top five safest cities are Luxembourg, Bern, Geneva, Helsinki, and Zurich. The top-ranked city in the United States is Honolulu, which came in at number 28, while New York City came in at 49, behind San Francisco, Boston, Washington, Chicago, and Portland, Ore.

Having been to -- yawn -- Zurich and -- double yawn -- Geneva, as well as several of the other cities that are ranked far ahead of Honolulu, I began to wonder what, exactly, the folks at Mercer were smoking. Not that there's anything wrong with Oslo (24), Stockholm (20), or Copenhagen (11), but putting these cities ahead of every U.S. city seems a little odd. And Zurich! Don't even get me started on the famed "Valium of the Alps!"*

When I read the fine print, I began to understand. Mercer's focus is on how much "hardship pay" the average executive should have to get when he or she gets sent to work in a city. Their primary considerations are internal stability, crime, effectiveness of law enforcement, and relationships with other countries. In that context, it seems pretty clear why the United States is ranking comparatively low in the world and Switzerland is at the top of the heap. It also explains why Nairobi (212), Karachi (213), Kinshasa (214), and Baghdad (215) round out the bottom of the list. Hopefully, with a little more political stability and some improved relationships with other countries, the United States will be able to reclaim its rightful place, directly below Switzerland!


*Actually, nobody calls Zurich "The Valium of the Alps." But they should.

Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. Having dragged his butt through some of the seedier parts of Amsterdam (13), he still has to wonder if the Mercer people are on crack.