Last week, I suggested that I Know My Kid's a Star was televised child abuse. I referred to one incident on the show (an extended encounter between a mother and daughter). Although I'm sure my viewpoint offended the mother involved, she made a polite comment. She wanted me - and you - to understand that the show was edited for impact, exaggerating the negative moments. I think her point is well-made. Arguing and drama sells on reality television. Let's take that as a given.

My point is different and tonight, when I write about this show, again - which I expect to do as long as it is aired - I'll make sure that it comes across. To clarify: my objection is less about the specific incidents depicted on the show than it is about what it does to children to be placed in the position of competing against other children when their mothers (or fathers) are so intimately involved in the competition.

I feel the same way about any child's activity in which the parent is heavily invested. It doesn't matter whether it is straight A's in school, pitching in Little League, or winning an art competition. The idea that a child she strive for early stardom doesn't help a child develop into a whole human being, comfortable about who (s)he is and able to enthusiastically pursue her interests, which may vary enormously from day to day.

There is a saying from Waldorf school literature that goes something like this: "That tree is strongest which grows most slowly at its beginnings."

Childhood isn't a race.

A decade ago, I asked a colleague, a counselor in a grade 5-6 public school,

"Is there anything particular that you've noticed that separates the kids who are doing well from those who aren't?"

"Yes," she said, "their parents have their own lives."

It was with a heavy heart that I watched, I Know My Kid's a Star tonight. Animals are treated better on sets than some of these children were on national television. I have to hope - and presume - that our animal protection societies are doing a better job than whoever is supposed to be looking out for the best interests of these children. I keep coming back to one word: appalling.

To be straightforward, I knew I wasn't going to like this show when I was asked to cover it. Whether it's sports, academics, or pageants - I hate seeing children pressured to achieve. Pressure undermines a child's natural inclination to learn and expand through play. Play by definition is not pressured. But as painful as it was to watch some of these children with their parents, it seemed even worse to watch them also being exploited for the benefit of the production company, advertisers and the adult "stars" who presumably were salaried to partake in this national display of child abuse.