The dog rental business started off as one of those crazy Japanese trends that Americans couldn't quite believe really existed. In Japan everybody has mind-blowing electronics, wears eyelash wigs, competes on wacky gameshows like live Tetris. And, oh yeah, they rent out dogs for $19 an hour or $100 a day.

An American company FlexPetz has tried to copy the formula here, staring with a small office in Iowa. No, just kidding. Where would someone start the Zipcar of dogs but in Los Angeles and New York? They claim they are for people who don't have the time or pet-friendly apartment for a real dog but the more popular theory is they're for singles who want to pick someone up.

FlexPetz tracks their dogs with GPS and says they use rescue dogs "where possible." The dogs in their pictures all seem to be purebreds, but FlexPetz tells the stories of some that come from shelters or were given up by owners. By all accounts they take great care of their dogs. What these dogs' emotional life is like after work, I'm not sure.

A while back I wrote about the growing market for special products to help senior dogs. Our pets are living longer and just like people they're spending more of their lives dealing with senior ailments. Pet suppliers are just now catching onto this trend and giving people the tools they need to help older dogs stay more active and comfortable.

Back in May I was still on a quest to find the most important piece of equipment for a senior dog -- or at least a senior dog who lives with stairs. That's a harness. As dogs get older, especially certain breeds and mixed breeds like shepherd or lab, they often lose muscle and nerves in their back end. (And these dogs, my vet tells me, don't suffer a lot of pain because they've lost some feeling.) Others have it worse with arthritis or hip dysplasia.

Whichever condition your dog has, odds are he's going to need help getting up the stairs.

Since May I've tried all the different kinds of harnesses. I'm sure each dog has his own preferences and special conditions, but here's what I found:

The children's begging never seemed to end.The clamoring grew louder. Endless, passionate promises concerning responsible ownership dominated our family's dinner and bedtime conversations. Finally, it became clear to me as I weakened that some form of pet acquisition was on the horizon, and it was going to have to be something with fur.

A dog was just too much. Diaper-changing memories were still too close for me to embrace the poop and the scoop. Cats presented allergy issues for some family members. Rabbits could be trained to a litter box, but who do you think would be doing the training? My younger self had expended too much energy keeping rodents at bay, so welcoming a mouse or hamster seemed to be a defeat of a different kind.

Thus it was through such questionable methods of pet deduction that Sprinkle and Splash, two Abyssinian guinea pigs, came in to our lives.

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They don't have to be walked, but they are good to cuddle and enjoy the occasional ride in a doll carriage. Poop is scooped when the human sees fit. They are too big to escape through most holes.They chirp, squeak, purr and otherwise communicate so that the children can say they "know exactly" what they want and that the creatures "talk" to them as in: "They said they wanted the organic lettuce!" They set a very good example concerning the eating of vegetables.

They are sweet little critters, and damn cute for rodents.

Last night, around 4 a.m., I was engaged in an almost nightly ritual: standing at my back door, waiting for our two dogs to return from doing their nightly business. Our yard is fenced in, so they can't roam far, but that doesn't stop our two large mixed breed dogs from hanging outside for quite some time. And so it provided me with some quiet time for myself -- to fume and wonder why I'm not asleep.

One of our dogs, Hooper, takes an interminable long time to return, unless I'm up for going outside in the darkness and hunting and calling for him, and that was the situation last night, and I began thinking how this knucklehead came into our lives.

In the midst of an ugly recession that has businesses worrying about Christmas spending, Halloween is turning into an unlikely strong spot in the economy. According to the National Retail Federation we'll spend nearly $6 billion on Halloween this year. And a growing part of that is in pet costumes.

More of us are planning to celebrate Halloween this year (64.5%, up from 58.7% last year). And we're collectively going to spend a little more each. The average person will spend $66.54, up from $64.82 a year ago. The typical budget is $24 for costumes (including pet costumes), $20 on candy, $4 on greeting cards and $18 on decorations. Halloween greeting cards? No, thanks--I'd like more candy.

PetSmart surveyed owners this year and found 16 million of us plan to dress up our pets. A survey from Dogster.com found 40% of dog owners had definite plans to dress up their dog, and an additional 25% will include their dog in festivities of some kind.

Quick, name one thing that would make your loved one more able to cope with living in a nursing home. If you said, "having a pet with him," then you'll want to keep reading.

When my father entered a nursing home 4 years ago, I had a recurrent fantasy. I would adopt a small, elderly dog - something about the size of a Pomeranian - and move it into his room, accompanied by a litter box. I would have been willing to go in everyday to change the litter. That's how much of a difference an old dog would have made for my old father in those last lonely years of his life. A dog on his lap in the wheelchair, sharing his meals from the tray, sleeping next to him through the night - would have made his life worth living.

When people suffer financially, their animals face hardship, too. At the beginning of the year the Humane Society warned about about shelters being overwhelmed. Dogs and cats were losing their families when those families lost their homes. Now we're hearing about all kind of animals suffering in the financial downturn. Basically any animal that depends on humans is a little bit less secure.

Dogs and Cats
Shelters around the country report a surge of animals surrendered. Some have surely been forced into the situation, but lots of animals seem to be cast out as if they were impractical luxury goods. In Los Angeles, an 11-year-old shepherd was left scared in the shelter; the Animal Shelter of Sterling, MA, tells the Worcester Telegram that they haven't seen this many surrendered animals in 15 years; dogs in Dallas are being dumped on the side of the road. And, as I wrote about earlier, some people cruelly abandoned their pets in the house as a way to inflict suffering on the bank -- never mind what it did to the animal.

Anti-Icky-Poo caught my eye during a recent visit to the pet shop. It is advertised as "Getting the stink out or your money back." Boasting a live bacteria/enzyme solution that eliminates pet stains and urine, I thought I would give it a try.

Now my husband, mother and daughter laughed when they saw my latest purchase. After all, I AM a bit of a sucker for these things, having previously bought Shoe Goo, which is suppose to make your shoes last longer. Their giggles turned to hysterical laughter when they read the back of the bottle which states in part, "It will digest any malodorous decay including liquid or dried fluids from vomit, feces, rotten vegetables, fish, milk, dead bodies, skunk musk and more, even smoke."

Dead bodies? Do a lot of people have those to clean up after?

There's that often-repeated saying that Harry Truman made famous: "If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog."

Perhaps presidential candidate Senator Barack Obama is thinking ahead. He reportedly has promised his daughters that after the election this November, they'll get a family dog. That is, at least, what I've learned from the well regarded Best Friends Animal Sanctuary, which is also the nation's largest sanctuary for dogs. They've been circulating an email, which is being forwarded across the country, and was forwarded to me by a cousin of mine -- heck, maybe you've already read it -- that urges people to sign a petition asking Mr. Obama to get a dog from a shelter or a rescue group rather than a pet store.

As the Best Friends Animal Sanctuary explains, "With millions of homeless pets still being killed in shelters every year, please adopt your dog from a shelter or rescue group. Don't buy from a pet store or breeder."

They've gone as far as creating a web site, www.obamafamilydog.com, where they're asking people to sign this petition.

It's a dog's life. Even when you're Leona Helmsley's little mutt.

A court in Manhattan today reversed a trust fund the Queen of Mean left for her dog, a Maltese named "Trouble" from $12 million to $2 million today. The 9-year-old dog lives in Florida with the general manager of the Helmsley Sandcastle Hotel.

The remaining $10 million will go to charity.

Poor poochie. Now maybe he'll have to eat dog food, like the little people.

Helmsley, the trophy-wife-turned-real-estate magnate, who uttered the notorious words, "We don't pay taxes. Only the little people pay taxes," died in 2007.

Friday June 20th is the 10th annual Take Your Dog to Work Day, a totally made up holiday, but a fun one. Pet Sitters International started celebrating in 1999, six years after the Ms. Foundation started bringing daughters into the workplace.

The purpose is entirely different. The daughters and sons are supposed to be learning about work world opportunities. On Dog Day, or TYDTWDay, as Pet Sitters calls it in shorthand, the dogs aren't supposed to learn anything (though I do think they're curious about where we go all day.) Instead it's your co-workers who are going to have their minds blown. The idea, according to Pet Sitters, is to encourage people to adopt dogs from shelters by showing them how much fun your dog is. Or, as they put it, "people without dogs will see the loving bond their co-workers have with their pets and will consider adopting orphaned pets for their own."

Sounds a little flimsy, but I still love it.

The similarities between the holidays don't end there. Answering understandable complaints for boys' parents, in 2003 the Ms. Foundation officially changed the holiday to include boys. It's now the Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day. Cat people didn't want to be excluded either, so now Take Your Pet to Work Week expands the holiday from June 16 to 20 (in case your office has something serious going on Friday). The kid holiday is somberly always on a school day, a Thursday, so that kids can go back and talk about what they learned on Friday. The dog holiday is the Friday after Father's Day, probably because it's a pretty casual time and nice weather.

Spring is here, and with new buds blooming and baby birds chirping, love is in the air and it's gone straight to the dogs. It's not that surprising when people are considering cloning their furry friends that there are tons of lavish ways to plan your pet's nuptials. Yes, we're in a recession and gas is over $4 a gallon. But why not blow some money on a taffeta bridal gown for your dog? Might sound ridiculous, but it's entirely possible.

If you're thinking of planning the perfect mutt-rimony ceremony, here are some options to consider:

ANIMAL ATTIRE
It doesn't matter if the groom needs to lift his paw to pee, he still needs to look good. PoochieHeaven.com has a surprisingly wide selection of formal dog wear, including a navy pinstripe tuxedo ($39.99), a white tuxedo (perfect until Labor Day, $39.99), and for the destination affair: A collared shirt with Hawaiian themed necktie ($27.99).

Larger brides and grooms don't have to sacrifice style to find the right plus-sized attire. At Bowwowsbest.com, sizes go up to XXL (or 70 pounds). Your golden doodle bride will feel nothing but beautiful in a three-tiered satin wedding gown with hand sewn chiffon flowers and matching six-layered tulle veil ($99.95). If she opts for a wedding party-and not all brides do-then scoop up pink satin bridesmaids dresses ($49.95) that come with matching leashes (always useful in case the bridal party gets a little wild).

When our sons were 6 and 9, without too much resistance from their father, I decided to get them a dog. It wasn't exactly what they were asking for. This wasn't one of those situations where the children beg and the all-wise parent says, "When you're old enough to take care of the dog ..." I knew who was going to take care of the dog. Anyway, no one else was thinking about one. The older son had his hopes set on the newest Playstation. The younger son was afraid of dogs, which was the clincher. The grandson of a man who had served in Army Canine during World War II wasn't going to be afraid of dogs.

I started with the ASPCA and the Animal Rescue League. It was slim pickings for puppies that year, so I expanded my horizons to the classifieds. I found the litter about an hour from home - mongrel puppies, their father a yellow Labrador, the mother a Shepherd-something. There were 9 of them and they were $40 each. I wanted a female, I told the owner, would Saturday be soon enough? She thought that it would be since the ad had just run for the first time. Just to be sure, I left my phone number. I wasn't surprised when she called back the next day to tell me that the puppies were going fast. She'd selected a female for us and outfitted her with a green collar.

The Airline industry is desperate. They've packed us in as tightly as they can, cut service and comfort to the bone marrow, crunched schedules and now they're charging for checking bags. (This week American announced it would charge $15 for its first checked bag. Last month American and other airlines announced they would charge $25 for the second checked bag.)

American also upped its fees for traveling pets. Just a few years ago they were $50. Now they're $100 each way in the cabin and $150 in the cargo hold, which is where dogs over 20 pounds have to go. But on behalf of dog owners everywhere, I'd like to say that all the major airlines are missing out on a huge new opportunity to gouge customers --- customers who would line up to pay exorbitant fees.

I'm talking about dog owners who would be willing to pay full-priced human fare to have a big dog fly safely in the cabin. The space of one seat could easily stack three or four crates. Hey, airlines executives and shareholders, are you getting excited yet? I'd eagerly pay hundreds of dollars extra. You could make me show up for a flight at 5 a.m. or 11 p.m. You could sit me in the middle seat in the last row behind a chatty family who reclines and between sales reps. You could offer up your most surly staff and flimsiest excuses for delays. And I'd still be thrilled if only I could get my 70-pound dog safely in a crate in the back of the cabin.

The stereotype of innocent, down and out foreclosure "victim" has been tarnished by a couple recent Wall Street Journal stories. First, there was the piece on people trashing their houses before turning them over to the banks: holes in the walls, paint on the carpet, etc.

Now a story (subscription required) that is so appalling I'm kind of at a loss for commentary:

In the country-club area of Anthem, Ariz., Barbara Ward-Windgassen's rescue group has saved a Bichon Frisé, Lhasa Apso and Shih Tzu -- some with their leashes still on -- after their owners abandoned them in their foreclosed homes ... It is a sign of tough economic times that have prompted several organizations to form hot lines for pet foster homes and to implore pet owners to seek help for their animals before they move.

People have to be implored to find shelter for their pets? If you need to be begged not to abandon your dog in an empty home, you shouldn't have a pet in the first place. Or a child. Or a spouse.

It's also interesting to me that the breeds that the Anthem, Arizona dog rescuer mentioned were cute little dogs. Of course, I understand that many people have these dogs and genuinely love them but, for some, these dogs that can be carried around in Louis Vuitton luggage are just status symbols.

Having lost the homes they can no longer afford, these posers were all too willing to leave their other status symbols behind too: the pets. They deserve neither a government bail-out nor a karmic bail-out.