Where do you draw the line? The six grossest ways to save money
Filed under: Extracurriculars, Saving Money
There's no doubt that saving money and being green are important aims, but there comes a time when every miser and would-be environmentalist faces an invisible dividing line. On this side lays all the money saving and resource-conserving things that are easy to do and emotionally acceptable; on the other side lays the abyss.
For some people, that line occurs fairly early, like when they're maintaining the speed limit on the highway, only to find themselves getting passed by a honking street-sweeper. For other people, the line occurs a little later, when they're dumpster diving and trying to decide if a half-consumed box of spaghetti is worth salvaging. For some, of course, the line never seems to come, and there is no act too humiliating, no money-saver too repulsive to keep them from trying to make a dollar scream for mercy.
As for us, there are things that definitely lie over the pale. With that in mind, we humbly offer the following six truly gross ways to save money. As you scroll through them, we have a feeling that you'll find exactly where your line lies!
DIY Feminine Supplies
While absolutely necessary, feminine hygiene products are also exceedingly wasteful. Tampons, for example, are mostly made of rayon, contain harsh deodorants, and are coated with a witch's brew of chemicals, including boron, aluminum, copper, and alcohol. For that matter, given their necessity, they are also very expensive; under the circumstances, it's hardly surprising that many enterprising souls have sought ways to derail the menstrual money train.
Many women have found that they can save money -- and the environment -- by making their own menstrual supplies. This site, for example, offers patterns for knitted or crocheted tampons. More artistic knitters can even work in decorative designs that undoubtedly make the experience all the more fulfilling. For the less crafty, the Hillbilly Housewife offers directions for making homemade menstrual pads and tampons. An added benefit of this approach is the distinct looks that one can create: the plaid flannel panty liners, for example, offer a jaunty LL Bean-style take that makes the traditional white pads look about as imaginative as a tennis uniform.
Using Poop
It's hard to fault people for wanting to make use of excreta. After all, it's cheap, plentiful, and loaded with useful chemicals. However, playing with the stuff is almost a universal no-no, which makes it rather hard to experiment with new and creative methods for processing it.
One popular use is burning. Supposedly, traditional Yemeni apartment buildings collect feces, allow them to dry, and burn them for fuel. Similarly, Tibetans use dried yak dung as a major fuel source, and this site offers a technique for building a stove that can burn dried cow patties. Of course, for many of us, the line between burning Bossie's cow pucks and our own feces is a deal-killer.
Another new use for old sh...tuff is composting. While the smell and microorganism count of feces tends to mitigate against their use around the yard, the "Graywater Guerillas" have suggested ways to process urine and what they call "humanure." Similarly, Toronto's "Green Bin" organics program collects and composts dirty diapers. While it's great that this program exists, I'd still have to argue that this is the kind of thing that is best undertaken by a large municipality, not by an aggressive environmentalist in suburbia.
Finally, for those who are eager to go the full nine yards, this site offers ecologically-conscious bricks that are made from cow patties. This, of course, gives a whole new meaning to the concept of crappy architecture.
Cooking Vermin
Even for the most omnivorous human, some animals are a little questionable. For example, although chickens, turkeys, ducks, and geese are all acceptable, eating pigeons seems fundamentally wrong. On one level, this is silly: after all, the gray birds are little different from their more common brethren. However, there's something about their incessant cooing, their oil-slick coloring, their seemingly never-ending supply of poop...for many, pigeons are on the other side of the line. However, as this site shows, there are some of us for whom the little winged rats are fair game.
Speaking of vermin, this site claims that the classic French dish "Entrecote a la Bordelaise" originally was made with rats, not rib steaks. For that matter, as this video demonstrates, the Louisiana Department of Wildlife and Fisheries is trying to convince Big Easy gourmands to eat "nutria," a huge rat-like rodent that infests the state's swamplands. However, as the site's author, The Cajun Boy, states, "We Cajuns will throw just about anything into a pot and serve it over rice, but we tend to draw the line at things whose scientific classification falls into the order of rodentia."
Recycling Nail Clippings
For some reason, nail clippings are the line for a lot of people. However, for those of us who can transcend our nail terrors, there are several uses for the things. According to this site, for example, they make great art, can be a homemade pot-scrubber, and can even serve as compost. Do not, however, try to boil them down to make gelatin; their primary ingredient is keratin, which is a definite no-go.
Hair Shirts
According to Ananova, a Romanian woman, Ioana Cioanca, has used her hair to knit a hat, a shawl, a skirt, a blouse, a raincoat, a purse, a handbag, and a pair of gloves. This was actually a lot harder than it sounds: she has been growing it since she was 16, largely in the hopes of one day being able to wear it. As Cioanca notes, some of her hair garments are lighter in color, as they were made after her hair began to go gray.
As repulsive as this sounds, there's a definite bright side: Cioanca never has to worry about the clothes matching her complexion!
As for us, there are things that definitely lie over the pale. With that in mind, we humbly offer the following six truly gross ways to save money. As you scroll through them, we have a feeling that you'll find exactly where your line lies!
DIY Feminine Supplies
While absolutely necessary, feminine hygiene products are also exceedingly wasteful. Tampons, for example, are mostly made of rayon, contain harsh deodorants, and are coated with a witch's brew of chemicals, including boron, aluminum, copper, and alcohol. For that matter, given their necessity, they are also very expensive; under the circumstances, it's hardly surprising that many enterprising souls have sought ways to derail the menstrual money train.
Many women have found that they can save money -- and the environment -- by making their own menstrual supplies. This site, for example, offers patterns for knitted or crocheted tampons. More artistic knitters can even work in decorative designs that undoubtedly make the experience all the more fulfilling. For the less crafty, the Hillbilly Housewife offers directions for making homemade menstrual pads and tampons. An added benefit of this approach is the distinct looks that one can create: the plaid flannel panty liners, for example, offer a jaunty LL Bean-style take that makes the traditional white pads look about as imaginative as a tennis uniform.
Using Poop
It's hard to fault people for wanting to make use of excreta. After all, it's cheap, plentiful, and loaded with useful chemicals. However, playing with the stuff is almost a universal no-no, which makes it rather hard to experiment with new and creative methods for processing it.
One popular use is burning. Supposedly, traditional Yemeni apartment buildings collect feces, allow them to dry, and burn them for fuel. Similarly, Tibetans use dried yak dung as a major fuel source, and this site offers a technique for building a stove that can burn dried cow patties. Of course, for many of us, the line between burning Bossie's cow pucks and our own feces is a deal-killer.
Another new use for old sh...tuff is composting. While the smell and microorganism count of feces tends to mitigate against their use around the yard, the "Graywater Guerillas" have suggested ways to process urine and what they call "humanure." Similarly, Toronto's "Green Bin" organics program collects and composts dirty diapers. While it's great that this program exists, I'd still have to argue that this is the kind of thing that is best undertaken by a large municipality, not by an aggressive environmentalist in suburbia.
Finally, for those who are eager to go the full nine yards, this site offers ecologically-conscious bricks that are made from cow patties. This, of course, gives a whole new meaning to the concept of crappy architecture.
Cooking Vermin
Even for the most omnivorous human, some animals are a little questionable. For example, although chickens, turkeys, ducks, and geese are all acceptable, eating pigeons seems fundamentally wrong. On one level, this is silly: after all, the gray birds are little different from their more common brethren. However, there's something about their incessant cooing, their oil-slick coloring, their seemingly never-ending supply of poop...for many, pigeons are on the other side of the line. However, as this site shows, there are some of us for whom the little winged rats are fair game.
Speaking of vermin, this site claims that the classic French dish "Entrecote a la Bordelaise" originally was made with rats, not rib steaks. For that matter, as this video demonstrates, the Louisiana Department of Wildlife and Fisheries is trying to convince Big Easy gourmands to eat "nutria," a huge rat-like rodent that infests the state's swamplands. However, as the site's author, The Cajun Boy, states, "We Cajuns will throw just about anything into a pot and serve it over rice, but we tend to draw the line at things whose scientific classification falls into the order of rodentia."
Recycling Nail Clippings
For some reason, nail clippings are the line for a lot of people. However, for those of us who can transcend our nail terrors, there are several uses for the things. According to this site, for example, they make great art, can be a homemade pot-scrubber, and can even serve as compost. Do not, however, try to boil them down to make gelatin; their primary ingredient is keratin, which is a definite no-go.
Hair Shirts
According to Ananova, a Romanian woman, Ioana Cioanca, has used her hair to knit a hat, a shawl, a skirt, a blouse, a raincoat, a purse, a handbag, and a pair of gloves. This was actually a lot harder than it sounds: she has been growing it since she was 16, largely in the hopes of one day being able to wear it. As Cioanca notes, some of her hair garments are lighter in color, as they were made after her hair began to go gray.
As repulsive as this sounds, there's a definite bright side: Cioanca never has to worry about the clothes matching her complexion!



Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
4-30-2009 @ 11:16AM
Miranda said...
Um, yeah. Anything that I put "up there" is not going to be DIY. I compromise by getting feminine hygiene products from companies like Seventh Generation. I'm sorry, but knitting a tampon? It just doesn't seem like a good idea...
Reply
4-30-2009 @ 2:03PM
Sue said...
I should have read this BEFORE I ate lunch. Gross!
Reply
4-30-2009 @ 2:22PM
frank said...
you dont have to knit a tampon. just chew the used ones til they turn white again, let them dry and reuse
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 7:22PM
Bob Dylan said...
Dude! That is just disgusting, revolting, and uncalled for. I myself am well known for my dry humor, but that comment has crossed so many lines of basic decensy.
5-05-2009 @ 2:32AM
Jo said...
Crude but I laughed like crazy!
4-30-2009 @ 2:43PM
Doug T said...
Now those first two posts were funny. Can't top them!!
The question is, after you have saved this money, what would be the best place to invest it and have it generate even more cash?
Just go to mutualfundwealth.com for the answers to that question . This site provides investment strategies that work/top performance sectors of the market place and much more.
Doug T.....The mutual fund guy
http://www.mutualfundwealth.com/
Reply
4-30-2009 @ 5:12PM
Jennifer @ Money Saver 101 said...
You've got to be kidding me. I can't imagine that.
A woman walks into the doctors' office waiting room and sees a woman crocheting in the corner as her baby sleeps in a stroller.
Woman 1: Making something for the baby? A cute little hat, perhaps?
Woman 2: No. This is for me.
Woman 1: Oh yeah? A scarf maybe?
Woman 2: No. Re-usable tampons.
You can imagine Woman 1's reaction - how would you react? LOL
http://moneysaver101.blogspot.com
Reply
4-30-2009 @ 6:49PM
areg said...
Wow, that was gross yet original - its important to find humor in the downturn - even if it causes a bit of nausea!!
Reply
5-01-2009 @ 11:37AM
JMalmstrom said...
Perfect timing! We just posted something that's actually kinda gross on our site www.planetcheapskate.com. Check out the post "Shall we live like our Grandparents?" for some Friday fun.
Reply
5-01-2009 @ 11:46AM
JMalmstrom said...
Perfect timing! We just posted something that's actually kinda gross on our site www.planetcheapskate.com. Check out the post "Shall we live like our Grandparents?" for some Friday fun.
Reply
5-02-2009 @ 11:58AM
Uncle B said...
Both Norway and Sweden use sewage and offal to generate bio-gas, Norway runs Oslo's buses on it, while Sweden sells it in compressed form in bottles, and in some parts of Africa and India, human excrement is communally collected, piped in concentrated form, and cooked for its bio-gas, gas used for cooking, sludge used for highly valued non-petroleum based fertilizer, the next great shortage in the world! I have often wondered if the rabbit and kangaroo populations of Australia, or the mice and rats of China, could be trapped and rendered into bio-diesel and fertilizer sludge also! Black-flies mosquitoes, deer-flies and horse flies in Northern Canada might make a good fertilizer if you can get enough of them all at once, and cheaply! Nobody likes sharks, lets have a go at rendering them! Bait the buggers, and turn them into bio-diesel! The new Euro- turbo-bio-diesel engines operate very clean and efficient, and will go diesel/electric soon! Imagine, 100 mpg on bio-diesel from poop and offal from the Chicago stock-yards! Imagine bio-gas from U.S. Factory Farms instead of stink! There things will come to be with the new "Carbon Tax" , an inevitable fact of American life, and the last great taxation, and all for our benefit, lucky us!
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 10:56PM
Steve said...
Hey Uncle - I can see how using vermin such as rats could be good for two reasons, but the world shark population is already hurting. I suggest we stick to using unwanted horses, pidgeons, rats, and cockroaches as fuel / feed / fertilizer.
5-04-2009 @ 7:21AM
Veronica said...
In rural England in the 40s we had an outhouse and one row of the vegetable garden was reserved each year to bury the bucket contents each week. Next year the row moved up and a line of pole beans grew proliferically!
Wild rabbits and pigeons were a welcome source of protein.
Sanitary supplies were very basic pads but Mum did not make her own in those days, although pads made of rags were her staple in her teens.
When toilet paper was scarce the newspaper was torn into squares and substituted
The largest sewage plant in London as early as the 50s and probably a lot earlier ran all their vehicles on Methane generated by the sewage.
Ah nostalgia
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 9:32AM
myramejia4 said...
I`VE NEVER HEARD SUCH A KNITTING TAMPOONS ! ^_^
THAT WAS WEARD FUNNY ! ^_^
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 10:15AM
douttfire said...
When my daughter was a baby, we used cloth diapers. We put the water, etc., from the diaper pail on our garden and had the BEST tomatoes! We also used a clothesline to dry all of our laundry. We composted just about everything we used. If I swept the floor, the dirt went into a compost pile. Lint from the dryer. We emptied the vacuum into the compost pile. Kitchen waste went in as well. We only composted dog poop during the winter, when we also composted yard debris.
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 12:52PM
Amanda said...
I heard you can also use sea sponges for tampon substitutes...they can be obtained at health-food stores, and can be washed and re-inserted. Just make sure to clean them thoroughly before the first use and after you're done with them for the month. Periodic replacement is required because they tend to disintegrate after a while, but their cost is a fraction of what conventional tampons are.
As for those of us who can't handle tampons (like people whose uteruses rebel at the mere THOUGHT of inserting something in there, you can make your own pads from cut-up strips of old towels. The number of layers can be varied according to the point in your cycle, and all it takes to wash them is cold water and a mild soap. (Now you know where the old phrase "on the rag" came from!)
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 5:02PM
recycler_guru said...
i use tea bag strings as dental floss
i make the wife reuse toilet paper she used for just peeing as her tampon when it redries
i make the kids throw all the "leftovers" in to a pail then i just run trough blender until it is like a milkshake... i let them add sugar on sundays if they pray and went to school
i collect rainwater to use for showers and got rid of flush toilet for outhouse where the droppings are used on rooftop garden
we eat all the mice we trap
cockaroaches, ants, houseflies, bees all go into our holiday fruitcake.... we just boil the rascals and then cook them until crisp
there are many ways to save a buck and help the environment, i am raising my children to understand this!
Reply
5-04-2009 @ 6:16PM
Erin said...
You take recycling to a whole new level. If you ask me; It's quite disturbing. All your teaching your children is to be extremely frugal. One should seek medical help ! I am not joking... Your sick
5-04-2009 @ 7:25PM
Shannon said...
I certainly hope you are kidding about most of that....
5-04-2009 @ 8:09PM
Alicia said...
Dear Lord, I hope that this is a joke! Goodness gracious!