Squeaky hips leave customers' noses out of joint
Filed under: Entrepreneurship, Insurance, Retire, Health
When I was a kid, my favorite Wizard of Oz character was the Tin Man. The Lion was furry, but obnoxious, and the Scarecrow was nice, but a little too spastic. Toto was a yappy little dog and Dorothy was a girl and everyone else was just too damn weird looking. The Tin Man, though, was warm and caring, could blow steam out of his head, and made all kinds of fun sounds. He was just too damn cool.I thought about the Tin Man recently because of some problems that Stryker Orthopaedics has been having with some of its replacement hips. Apparently, the company has a line of ceramic-lined hips that are guaranteed to last far longer than conventional plastic hips.
On the bright side, the hips have, thus far, lived up to their promise: in most cases, they are showing far less wear-and-tear than their plastic competitors. On the down side, 1-7% of these implants have developed an obnoxious squeak. Unlike the Tin Man, however, Stryker's customers can't get rid of their squeaks with a precise application of oil; they need to get their hips replaced again, a costly and intense surgical procedure with tons of potential complications.On one level, this seems pretty funny. After all, most of Stryker's squeakers aren't feeling any pain from their squeaking joints, nor are they suffering from dislocation, infection, or any of the other life-threatening problems that are often associated with prosthetic installation. The replacements are still good, and will probably continue to function for decades to come. On the other hand, after listening to the sound of a squeaking hip, I realized that this is no laughing matter. Having to constantly hear the sound of a chalkboard every time I walk would drive me crazy. Add in the fact that, as one patient complained, "it can interrupt sex when my wife starts laughing," and you've got a real quality-of-life issue here.
Hopefully, I've got a few years before this becomes an issue for me; one of the best parts of being a member of "Generation X" is that I've got the whole "Baby Boomer" cadre standing in front of me, waiting to work out the kinks on any new technology. That having been said, I hope that Stryker can find a way to square things with its hip customers!
Bruce Watson is a freelance writer, blogger, and all-around cheapskate. He is hoping that brain transplant surgery is a reality by the time he's in his eighties.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
5-12-2008 @ 6:53PM
Jack (SFC: 4983 4617 3409) said...
Dang, for the price and seriousness of the surgery, this sucks. Squeaks are annoying. Its not like the 1-7 percent got cool robot sounds or something. And old people tend to give the stink eye to new tech as it is. This problem isn't going to make the elderly feel very comfortable.
Well, being part of the generation after X I'll let you, Bruce, test the brain transplants. I'll reap the benefits!
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5-12-2008 @ 8:17PM
Bruce Watson said...
Jack, you might have hit on the solution. Doctors need to install miniature sound chips that can play a variety of sounds. When the joints start to squeak, the users merely turn on their cool sounds and start doing their robot imitations.
Well done!
5-12-2008 @ 9:45PM
docbsc69 said...
Well this is not their only problem, squeaking is yes they do that, but that shatter like an egg shell. Hmmmm think about it ceramic, what happens to a ceramic flower gets knocked over. Know image those pieces in your hip.................... Not Good. Is there a better hip out there? Yes there is! The BHR hip from Smith & Nephew Ortho. This hip functions very well.
Very light wear if none, no squeaking and functions more like you orginal hip due to less bone, vessel and nerve loss. Atop of all that is metal not ceramic.
Check it out and do some research.
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5-12-2008 @ 9:48PM
Bruce Watson said...
Good to hear, Doc, but there isn't any proof that Stryker's ceramic hips are prone to explosion, nor is there any proof that there are other problems related to the squeaking. And, while we're at it, don't metal hips emit ionically-charged metal shavings?
5-13-2008 @ 8:38AM
Michael said...
Wife laughs at you cause your hip squeeks during sex??? What is the big deal... How about those poor wives that can't get none??? They are the ones that have a right to complain....
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5-13-2008 @ 8:40AM
Bruce Watson said...
Michael-
There's this classic argument about whining; if I remember correctly, it goes something like: "I felt bad because I had no shoes...then I met a guy who had no feet!" Admittedly, it's a good argument--after all, as bad as one person's problems are, another person always has it worse.
On the other hand, having your wife end sex because she can't stop laughing about your hip really must suck. Think about it!
5-22-2008 @ 9:28AM
Ed Heary said...
Strker lies when it says that there have been no shattering of hips.
This is a post from someone in Sydner
"My hip shattered at a restaurant in Sydney - people dived for cover,'cos they they thought a bomb had gone off, it was that loud!- I was totally immobilised and was completely paralysed for a short while as I slumped to the ground - but what if I was driving my car on the freeway with the kids in the back? That's what infuriates me about all this. May be more people need to get angrier about it, because it's not right."
Here is a You Tube Video of my Stryker Trident Hips that pop, grind and squeak with every step. I fear they too might shatter (I have both hips replaced with this Stryker hip). You tell me if there is a problem after listening to my video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JM0IkHRX3Oc
Ed Heary
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