Are there bullies in your 'Office Space?'
Filed under: Career, Health, Relationships
A recent Forbes.com article about bullies in the workplace reads like a primer for Office Space, that fine cult comedy that anyone who's ever set foot in a cube farm can relate to. With that in mind, here are some signs of bullying to watch out for, translated into some of the movie's best-loved catch phrases:- A case of the Mondays: You often feel physically ill at the start of each new work week.
- Your TPS report needs a cover sheet: Your work is constantly criticized, and your mistakes are repeatedly brought up.
- That's my stapler: Your boss is isolating you, going as far as to move your desk.
- Yeah, I'll need you to come in this Saturday: Your boss always schedules last-minute after-hours meetings.
- Not enough flair: Your supervisor finds nit-picky ways to ensure you'll fail at your job.
So how to cope with office bullies? In a 2007 report entitled "How to Bust the Office Bully," Arizona State University's Project for Wellness and Work-Life recommends that targets figure out a rational way to tell their stories to colleagues, bosses or human resources while managing their emotions. Emphasizing your competence and showing consideration for others' perspectives is also crucial, the report says.
Or, if you feel like your company supports this kind of negative behavior, you might want to take a cue from Peter Gibbons, the anti-hero of Office Space, and stop showing up to work. Unlike Peter, though, you'll probably want to actually quit your job first.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
4-08-2008 @ 1:56PM
BenLeichtling said...
Hi Anne,
Thanks for the post.
My experience in this area has been extensive. I’ve listed the early warning signs of overt and “stealth bullies” in my books, “How to Stop Bullies in Their Tracks” and “Bullies Below the Radar: How to Wise Up, Stand Up and Stay up.” Most people have a gut reaction that they’re being jerked around or abused even if they couldn’t prove it in court.
Here are some recommendations:
Wise Up!
1. There have always been bullies and always will be. They come in all sizes, shapes and levels of the academic totem pole. That doesn’t mean that you have to accept it. Some bullies are very bright. Many are what I call “stealth bullies.” They’re covert, sneaky, manipulative, critical, controlling, verbally abuses, emotionally intimidating and backstabbing with a smile.
2. Use legal protection if you can, but don’t count on it. Most of the bullying passes under the legal radar. And laws still have to be applied by people. Many people won’t. Be grateful when you get help, but don’t count on it and don’t be stopped if you’re on your own.
3. Change the discussion from “why bullies do it and the nuances of how,” into a discussion of how to stop bullies in their tracks.
4. Learn to fight; teach your friends and children to deal with the real world. You won’t win every fight, but when you fight back you’ll stop a higher percentage of bullies. You will need to be brave, courageous, determined, persevering and resilient.
5. Recognize and label bullies as bullies. If you have any doubt, learn the early warning signs. Recognizing and labeling them will reinforce your identification of who’s the problem – they are.
6. Recognizing and labeling can take you out of “helpless, victim mentality.” Stop asking, “What did I do wrong” or “What did I do to deserve it.” A bully is a bully is a bully.
7. Ignore the idea of, “Don’t stoop to their level.” Do stoop to using language they understand. Raise the stakes on them if you can.
8. Administrators are just like principals of elementary, junior high, middle and high schools. Some act, but many look the other way; they tolerate, condone, protect or encourage bullies. You will have to force those administrators to act.
Stand up!
1. Stop analyzing all the different forms of bullying, stop examining statistics, stop analyzing why they do it. You know more than enough already. Just look at the comments here and in the original New York Times article. Don’t let predators get you.
2. Act to protect and defend yourself and your friends and colleagues in your specific situation. Act as rapidly as you can; don’t wait until you have absolute proof. Bullies don’t take passivity (begging, pleading, minimizing, ignoring) as kindness, caring or you taking the high moral ground. Bullies take passivity as an invitation to hit you harder.
3. Shine a light on it. Get allies; gang up on bullies. Isolate them if you can. Undermine their position and power.
4. Don’t react with emotional outbursts; stay professional. Get evidence and document. Look for loss of productivity (decreasing publications, grants and awards, or increasing turnover). Look for “smoking guns.” If the bully has power, look to increase your leverage. Administrators hate publicity and scandal. Use their fear as leverage.
5. Don’t get sucked into a rehabilitation model. Stop bullies first. Kick them off your island or isolate them in a very tiny room with other bullies. Then you can become their therapist (if that’s what you get paid for).
6. Don’t stay in a hostile workplace you can’t change. Be prepared to leave and make your exit interview public.
I see more bullies in academia, government offices, non-profits and public service organizations.
Disclosure: I’m a coach and consultant, and have written books, and produced CDs about stopping bullies at work and in personal life. My web site and blog are at: www.BulliesBeGone.com. I've written many articles about overt and stealth bullies. For example, see the online archives of my column in the Denver Business Journal.My web site and blog are at: www.BulliesBeGone.com.
Good luck,
Ben
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